Reviews by PvtCaboose91

Easily the purest Sam Raimi movie since Evil Dead II, Drag Me to Hell is a triumph - one of the best movies of 2009. This horror tour de force is precisely the movie needed to revitalise the genre after a string of superfluous remakes (The Grudge, One Missed Call) and torture porn features (Saw, Hostel). Best of all, Drag Me to Hell allows Raimi the opportunity to reawaken his visceral horror instincts that were mummified by the big-league, big-budget Spider-Man trilogy. Even with the teen-friendly PG-13 rating in place, this is classic Raimi. So why is this PG-13 horror romp a rousing success while other modern horrors fall flat? Two factors stand out - Raimi's respect for his audience, and his desire to make horror fun again. In trademark Raimi style, Drag Me to Hell lurches from wild laughs to beautifully choreographed scares with a steady sleight of hand. The story is basic, the gimmicks are familiar and the mythology is laughable, but Raimi is highly confident with what he's presenting. This is a movie which demands to be seen with a large audience, milking every gasp and laugh for the best experience.

Drag Me to Hell begins with the decades-old Universal Studios logo, establishing a sense of nostalgia to get the audience in the mood for what follows. This old-fashioned exercise in terror transports an audience back to an era when horror was all about providing a fun, suspenseful carnival ride of fright flick...before torture porn tendencies clogged up vital artistic arteries.

Following an insanely atmospheric pre-title sequence, we're thrust right into the primary story. Christine Brown (Lohman) is a bank loan officer vying for a promotion against a brown-nosing colleague (Lee). In order to receive this promotion, she's told she has to be able to make the "tough decisions". Thus, when the normally soft-centred Christine is approached by aging gypsy Mrs. Ganush (Raver) who asks for a third extension on her mortgage payment, she denies the request. And for this, there is literally hell to pay. Things slowly go downhill for Christine from there as she finds herself the recipient of a supernatural curse placed on her by Mrs. Ganush. The shadowy demon haunting Christine begins toying mercilessly with her, and after three days she'll be dragged down to Satan's dominion.

Drag Me to Hell provides a thin membrane of a plot, quickly setting up Christine's workplace ambition and demonic dilemma which leaves plenty of time for Raimi to torment his heroine in creative ways. Naturally the film is more about the tour de force terror sequences, of which there are plenty. The film's biggest blessing is its humour, which ranges from one-liners to a hilariously awkward dinner scene during which Christine meets her boyfriend's parents. But the best moments occur when the horror elements combine with this humour, and you begin laughing in a combination of terror and delight. If you're not laughing with every scream, you're only getting half the experience. Raimi has an uncanny knowledge of what his audience really wants, ratcheting up the tension when necessary and keeping things moving at a perfectly brisk pace. He even has the good grace to add an extra scare when the pace slows down. In the tight 95-minute running time, not a moment feels wasted.

Raimi isn't too interested in extravagant bloodshed as he frequently uses booming sound effects to generate a mood of inexorable unease instead. This isn't a lazy director hitting the cheap scare button...this is Sam Raimi, and he's a horror maestro. Anyone concerned that Raimi didn't go all the way with this one due to the big studio backing - and worse, the dreaded PG-13 rating - can easily put their fears to rest. There's less blood, but there are some gruesome moments and the bodily fluids flow freely, not to mention the scares are continually thrown at you. Drag Me to Hell is one of the loudest movies of recent memory. Raimi wants the viewer to experience Christine's physical torment through the raucous soundtrack, giving the director a chance to spotlight his Evil Dead roots. The grandiose score courtesy of Christopher Young is the cherry on top.

Most welcome is Raimi's refusal to turn Drag Me to Hell into a CGI-fest of a horror film, instead relying on more traditional effects. It's amazing how much mileage Raimi is able to get out of an acrobatic camera, canted angles, old-fashioned make-up effects and a couple of shrieking possessed people suspended on wires. It's exciting to behold a film released in 2009 that benefits from the vitality of practical effects along with the judicious use of digital effects when appropriate. The CGI is admittedly a tad cheesy, but intentionally so - it adds to the camp appeal.

Although this isn't a message film, Drag Me to Hell can be perceived as a cautionary tale about the perils of greed (rather similar to Raimi's own A Simple Plan). Christine's one concession to ambition is enough to damn her to a horrific ordeal. The film's release is rather timely - with the world in an economic crisis, audiences can be expected to enjoy watching a banker suffer.

Alison Lohman stepped into the shoes of Christine Brown when Ellen Page dropped out during pre-production due to scheduling difficulties. Lohman is no Bruce Campbell, but she nimbly succumbs to a Raimi horror beatdown (being tossed around like a projectile ragdoll time and time again) while retaining much of her natural charisma. She does an amazing job with what is usually a thankless horror victim role, managing to be both in on the joke and sincere without tipping her hand either way. As the vengeful gypsy women, Lorna Raver is disgusting and formidably menacing. Justin Long is also good as her comic relief boyfriend, while new faces like Dileep Rao leave a big impression. Character development is a huge positive factor here - all key characters are fleshed out and developed wonderfully, which is amazing for a horror film. Granted, the acting is somewhat hammy and the dialogue can be tin-eared, but this suits the film's style.

Some simply won't get what Sam Raimi was trying to do with Drag Me to Hell. For everyone else, this is an absolute blast. You'd have to be crazy to pass up the opportunity to see this nuanced symphony of the macabre. The trailer was correct about one thing: this is a return of true horror. It's also the return of true Raimi, and it's great to have him back.

9.1/10

For fervent action buffs, Joshua Tree (also known as Army of One) is a definite must-see - it stars action icon Dolph Lundgren, and it's directed by legendary stunt coordinator Vic Armstrong. It's a breathless exercise in hardcore action violence, and it moves at such an exhilarating pace that its stupidity and conventionality can be easily overlooked for the sake of entertainment.

In Joshua Tree, the Dolphster plays former race car driver Wellman Santee. With his racing days long behind him, Santee's livelihood is now transporting exotic stolen cars. During a run-in with the police, however, his partner (Foree) is killed along with a highway police officer in a shootout, and Santee is framed for the policeman's murder. But while being transferred to prison, Santee escapes. He abducts a young woman named Rita (Alfonso), unaware that his hostage is actually a deputy sheriff. What ensues is a variety of action sequences as Santee struggles to clear his name.

Logic is disposed of fairly quickly into this feature (as is any sense of originality). For instance Rita looks surprisingly calm considering she has been kidnapped. She's also given endless opportunities to escape or turn the tables on her abductor, but she rarely capitalises on these opportunities. There's also the fact that police officers are unable to shoot properly (despite, you know, being trained to use firearms). During an encounter with Chinese gangsters at one stage in the film, cliché after cliché is doled out - the gangsters are incompetent shooters while Santee is a perfect marksman, and guns even run out of bullets at the most convenient of times. Stupidity really kicks in when the climax comes around. Said climax features a series of brutal hand-to-hand combat battles, but the combatants never succumb to any serious harm despite being pounded with fists and inanimate objects continuously. Some of the protagonists are shot too, but bullets don't seem to faze them. However, as these things are virtually unwritten requirements for action films of the '80s and '90s, they're somewhat forgivable.

Joshua Tree was written by Steve Pressfield, who had previously penned the Steven Seagal vehicle Above the Law. Pressfield takes a formulaic tale of dirty cops and a man out for revenge, and constructs a fairly involving narrative. The trajectory of the plotline is the very definition of predictability, but it's the action and the decent dialogue that hold our interest. Plus, we've come here to see the Dolphster kicking some butt...and in this respect, it delivers in spades! Another unwritten law for action films is one-liners - since a lot of actioners are hilariously ridiculous and tongue-in-cheek, humour is often employed to match the tone. Screenwriter Pressfield delivers in this aspect too.

With renowned stuntman and action director Vic Armstrong at the helm (a man who handled the stunts for the Indiana Jones films, a lot of the James Bond films, Starship Troopers, Patriot Games and Universal Soldier, just to name a few), one can expect Joshua Tree to deliver oodles of satisfying action, which it does! Armstrong delivers breathtaking, over-the-top action set-pieces, ranging from a John Woo-esque shootout in a warehouse to a high-octane car chase featuring a Ferrari and a Lamborghini. Blood squibs explode left, right and centre...this is an unapologetic R-rated action film. To top everything off, Joel Goldsmith has provided a terrific score - it features atmospheric background music for the quiet sections, and chest-thumping music for the action. But the editing is occasionally very choppy, and there are a number of technical faults in general.

Due to the excessive violence of Armstrong's directorial debut, the censors went bonkers and the film was edited down for a number of countries (like Britain, where it still received an '18' rating even after the graphic violence was toned down). Bizarrely, three different endings exist for this flick. Unfortunately (as of 2009), the version of the film containing the best ending (which wraps up everything) is yet to be released on any format (be it DVD or Blu-ray).

Dolph Lundgren earned his chops as an action star after his appearance in Rocky IV opposite Sylvester Stallone. Although Lundgren never truly acts much during the film (he merely says lines instead of meaning them), he's perfect for the role of Santee - he has the physique of an action hero, and he knows his way around an action sequence. Best of all, he's competent enough to hold our interest. Alongside the Dolphster is the duo of George Segal and Beau Starr as the main villains of the picture. It's easy to hate these guys, which makes Santee's plight easier to sympathise with. And as the trademark woman of the picture with the perfect body, there's Kristian Alfonso. Naturally, her character gets naked at one point (laughably gratuitous) and she ends up becoming the Dolphster's love interest.

At the end of the day, Joshua Tree is just a disposable '90s actioner that remains essential viewing for genre aficionados. This ain't anything groundbreaking, but it's definitely an entertaining distraction best enjoyed when the thinking side of your brain craves a rest.

5.7/10

District B13 is unadulterated action porn. It's a series of kinetic action sequences tied together by an incidental plot and a forgettable script. Directed by Pierre Morel and produced by French super-producer Luc Besson, this is an adrenaline-pumping blast from start to finish that's loaded with style, wit and jaw-dropping acts of physical prowess - and although it's light on plot, it never slows down to let viewers notice. For those unaware, Luc Besson has produced an array of satisfying action films, ranging from the Transporter series to Jet Li vehicles (Kiss of the Dragon and Unleashed, for instance). If you're familiar with the aforementioned movies, you should know precisely what to expect from District B13 (originally titled Banlieue 13). For genre fans seeking solid entertainment, Besson has served up another spry, sleek winner.

The future of Paris envisioned in District B13 sees the worst districts surrounded by isolation walls, effectively cutting off all inhabitants of these areas from the rest of society and keeping the crime rates under control. The denizens of these slums are forced to live without education, proper utilities and police protection. The main story takes place in the 13th district during 2010, and a stolen neutron bomb is in the possession of the district's most powerful drug lord: Taha (Naceri). An undercover police officer named Damien (Raffaelli) is tasked with the assignment of finding the stolen nuclear weapon which will detonate in 24 hours. To be his guide inside the most volatile section of Paris, Damien recruits a man named Leito (Belle) who has his own score to settle with Taha.

District B13 is merely a torrent of action sequences tightly packed into an 85-minute runtime. It doesn't take long for the film to kick into high gear, and once the action begins it only occasionally lets up for brief scenes of exposition. There's not a boring moment at any point during the film as it throttles forward at breakneck pace from one high-flying action scene to the next. Better yet, the death-defying stunts were done primarily without the aid of wires or CGI. And unlike their Hollywood counterparts, French filmmakers know how to shoot and edit these sequences. They don't rely on close-ups or shaky cam, nor are these scenes over-edited to the point of indecipherability.

For the film's opening sequence, David Belle employs his own philosophy of Parkour - i.e. the art of navigating urban spaces quickly and gracefully by overcoming physical obstacles in the quickest and most direct manner possible. The man races across rooftops, slides down railings and crashes through a miniscule window above a door - just to name a few of the eye-popping stunts - as he evades a group of gun-wielding enemies (and it was mainly done for real). But his co-star Cyril Raffaelli is not to be outdone - the former circus acrobat and martial arts champion has plenty of his own moments to shine. Raffaelli's stunts are all about the fighting as he punches and kicks; disarming enemies in the most efficient way possible. Belle and Raffaelli (both of whom had a hand in creating the stunts and action scenes) make an excellent duo. It's during the film's second half that these two stars team up to crack some skulls, and that's when District B13 truly kicks into overdrive.

But the slender screenplay (written by Besson with colleague Bibi Naceri, who also plays Taha) is plagued with contrivances barely acceptable for an action film like this (the reception for Damien's mobile phone when he needs to diffuse the bomb, for instance). The characters are pretty one-dimensional as well.

For those concerned with having to constantly read subtitles (the film is in French), have no fear - District B13 is far from dialogue-driven, and it's simple to follow. Do yourself a favour and check out this incredibly visceral action film in which the on-screen action is dripping with the blood and sweat of real stunt work. The plot can be forgiven as the action is energetic, the athleticism is astonishing and the soundtrack is pulsating. A terrific way to spend 85 minutes!

7.8/10

A screen adaptation of the 2002 novella of the same name by Neil Gaiman, Coraline signals Henry Selick's long-overdue return to the realm of stop-motion animation (after The Nightmare Before Christmas and James and the Giant Peach). In an era dominated by computer-animated movies (courtesy of Pixar, Dreamworks, etc), stop-motion puppeteers are few and far between, which makes Coraline an enchanting breath of fresh air. Better yet, the film doesn't rely on toilet humour, blatant morals or hackneyed plotting. Just like The Nightmare Before Christmas, Selick's latest effort can be absorbed by both kids and adults - kids can admire the luxurious visuals, while adults can absorb the themes and enjoy the scares. Coraline is a gorgeous motion picture, but it lacks substance, and the visuals often overwhelm basic storytelling requirements.

Fundamentally Alice in Wonderland reconfigured for David Lynch fans, this eerie-yet-elegant tale sets its sights on an adventurous young girl named Coraline (voiced by Dakota Fanning). Having moved with her family to a remote apartment building in Oregon (far away from her friends), Coraline is bored with her new home and annoyed by the inattentiveness of her workaholic parents. One day Coraline discovers a hidden door that turns out to be a portal which transports her to a bizarre alternative dimension that contains an idealised version of her home. But the time-honoured cliché applies: if it looks too good to be true, it probably is...

As the animation realm gradually becomes dominated by computers, Henry Selick seems wholly content operating in the world of stop-motion. It's impossible to deny the visual mastery of Coraline when it's a proud member of the stop-motion club; relinquishing routine CG sheen for breathtaking textures and luscious artistry that can be delivered only through this painstaking process. Selick's amazing visual style is almost smooth enough to be mistaken for CGI, but there's a distinctive appearance to this approach that reveals itself as something more laborious. Selick additionally explores Gaiman themes of heroism and magic while furthering his own interest in spooky creatures and surreal Burton-esque production design. Coraline has been tagged with a well-earned PG rating as it definitely falls on the dark side of the fairytale spectrum. It isn't an excessively violent movie, but there are a few intense, frightening scenes.

The plot, while admittedly rather slim, is involving from start to finish, and the narrative trajectory is rather unpredictable in spite of the incorporation of familiar elements. The key problem with Coraline is one of pacing - the story progresses at one pace throughout, and never heats up. Meanwhile (and there's no other way to put it), the film is gorgeously off-putting - a considerable achievement of visual dread. In the end it's pretty blah, yet (even without a story worth telling) the visual panache is compelling.

In a post-WALL-E animation market, a movie must come armed with insight into the world at large. In this respect, Coraline contains solid ruminations on parenting, individuality, and (most brazenly) the bond between mother and daughter. The voice acting is solid as well. Dakota Fanning is unrecognisable yet instantly likeable and boundlessly appealing as the feature's titular character. The rest of the vocal performers are equally unrecognisable. Teri Hatcher has no difficulty with her role as Coraline's two mothers, seemingly channelling the Wicked Witch of the West for her verbal performance as the Other Mother. Ian McShane does solid work as the Russian who runs a mouse circus upstairs, while Jennifer Saunders and Dawn French voice Coraline's strange downstairs neighbours. There's also Keith David as a prophetic black cat who plays a vital role in the story.

Though a few of the more perverse concepts from Neil Gaiman's Coraline novella have been excluded, the author's talent for dark and lively imagery has been translated with gravitas by Henry Selick. Despite a well-worn message (the grass is always greener/be careful what you wish for) and the fact that this enchantment runs out of steam before it ends, Selick's latest project remains a laudable accomplishment in animation and imagination - lean, funny, and entertaining. You don't have to be a child to be enchanted by it.

7.6/10

A full frontal (excuse the pun) cinematic assault on homophobia and celebrity culture, Brüno gives Sacha Baron Cohen the opportunity to bring another of his misfit characters to the big screen in this follow-up to the hugely successful Borat. After achieving worldwide notoriety with Borat, it'd seem impossible for Cohen to anonymously deceive people with his provocative candid-camera antics once again. But lo and behold - the devilish actor has pulled it off thanks to a fresh new guise, and has found a new group of unsuspecting people to exploit for laughs. Cohen, who seems to have a pathological hate for America, has again proved that the US is indeed home to the dumbest, most screwed-up people on the planet. Brüno is a worthy successor to Borat - it employs a similar tactic of exploiting the idiocy, ignorance, and prejudice present in American society as a form of satire and social commentary while offering scripted comedy and mockumentary-style gags. But that's its only real weaknesses - Borat was so fresh and bizarrely unprecedented, while Brüno feels like more of the same.

As expected, plot is at a minimum as this is just a loosely connected chain of skits that allow the filmmakers to pierce something with their satirical knife (and turn the blade in the wound). The title character, Brüno (Cohen), is a homosexual Austrian fashion reporter whose television show (Funkyzeit) has established him as an icon in fashion circles. But a catastrophic incident at a fashion show leads to Brüno becoming fired, which ruins his reputation. Accompanied only by devoted assistant Lutz (Hammaresten), Brüno travels to America with plans to become "the biggest Austrian superstar since Hitler." The exiled fashionista apes the headline-grabbing antics of stars such as Angelina Jolie and Madonna in his single-minded pursuit for fame.

Brüno doesn't contain a rigid structure - it merely establishes a sense of purpose for our Austrian hero to go fourth and spread his unique brand of cheer. Using the central character's homosexuality as the bayonet on the film's rifle of satire, Brüno is more concerned with provoking violent responses through offensive material than trying to stitch together a coherent feature film. The film eventually sheds all dramatic pretences in order to run free in the fields of Cohen's disconcerting imagination, placing the character in interesting situations of conflict to capture the priceless reactions of unwitting victims. Brüno doesn't just cross the line...it crosses the line, laughs at the line, makes a new line, crosses that line, and then rapes the new line. If the nude wrestling sequence in Borat was too much for you...well, you ain't seen nothing yet.

While the laughs aren't as constant as one would anticipate, Brüno does deliver comedy in spades (as long as you're not easily offended). The feature fails to break new ground for Cohen and his comic impulses, but it certainly gives him welcome room to play. Borat was hardly restrained or in good taste when it came to sexual gags, but the seriously questionable taste of Brüno makes its predecessor seem like a morality play in comparison. Brüno was initially slapped with an NC-17 rating by the MPAA before Cohen removed several minutes in order to acquire an R rating for its theatrical release. But what remains is still incredibly hardcore and disgustingly explicit. Its rating is deserved!

When it comes to the unscripted skits, Sacha Baron Cohen has two primary targets - homophobia and celebrity culture - and he ain't shy about attacking either of them. The film is ripe with excessive homosexual stereotypes, with much of the humour derived from the clueless bystanders' reactions to the flamboyant Brüno.

The novelty factor of Brüno is lessened because the style is no longer fresh. It doesn't help that the film rehashes the basic plot of Borat: a foreign TV personality and his loyal sidekick depart from their homeland and embark upon a quest, along the way exposing the prejudices of the unsuspecting people they encounter. Unfortunately, too, Brüno feels far more manufactured. While the roughness around the edges of the video and audio make everything seem real, it's difficult to subdue the suspicion that some of the victims were primed to perform. In the end, Brüno isn't funny enough either; the juicy belly laughs are few and far between. Cohen usually forces gags instead of allowing the humour to emerge organically.

Sacha Baron Cohen's performance as the homosexual Austrian is expectedly terrific. Like Borat, the man hides behind an unrecognisable screen persona and immerses himself into the role 100%. Cohen is clearly prepared to do an array of preposterous things for the sake of amusing footage. The entire film is just a game of chicken that's played to see how far Sacha Baron Cohen will go to annoy people and get laughs. If the man has limits, none are in evidence. Cohen may have many things - a wife, money, fame and success - but shame is a virtue he doesn't possess.

Look out for cameos from countless celebrities as well, including Harrison Ford (the funniest ten seconds of the movie), Paula Abdul and Ron Paul. During the closing credits, Brüno also records a charity song with such celebrities as Bono, Elton John, Snoop Dog and Sting.

In the long run, Brüno achieves its goal - it provides a social commentary using guerrilla tactics, and it's quite funny. It's narratively structured exactly like its predecessor and it treads similar satirical ground, but it's still enjoyable. Sacha Baron Cohen may be a one trick pony, but he knows how to give an audience (*ahem*) a good ride. Just like Borat, some will praise this film a masterpiece of its genre while others will demonise it as unfunny, offensive pornographic excess. If you're part of the latter camp, I suggest you lighten up.

6.9/10

More than anything else, 2008's Yes Man represents a chance for Jim Carrey to reclaim his bygone slapstick glory days following a fleeting, unsuccessful venture into drama (The Number 23) and a restrained period in animation (Horton Hears a Who!). Carrey harkens back to his usual tricks here, aiming to make us laugh the old-fashioned way in this screen adaptation of the novel by satirical British writer Danny Wallace. Admittedly, Yes Man's narrative conceit - a man deciding to change his life by saying "yes" to every opportunity - ostensibly resembles Carrey's 1997 comedy vehicle Liar Liar. Unfortunately, too, every plot-related aspect of Yes Man - the construction of the story, the set-up, the conflict and the resolution - is the definition of predictability. However, Carrey's sincere performance coupled with the laughs, the breezy pacing and the honest-to-goodness chemistry between the two leads successfully invigorates the material. It is utterly enjoyable from start to finish.

Carrey's character here is a lonely, miserable corporate drone named Carl Allen. Due to his depression following a brutal divorce, Carl has given up on life, routinely ignoring his friends Pete (Bradley Cooper) and Rooney (Danny Masterson) as he spends his time watching DVDs alone in his apartment. However, when an old acquaintance (John Michael Higgins) urges Carl to attend a motivational seminar, he ends up enrolling in a personal development program based on a simple principle: say "yes" to every opportunity, invitation or request that presents itself. Carl finds his existence transformed, leading to some startling changes. He develops a relationship with musician/photographer/aerobics instructor Allison (Zooey Deschanel), is unexpectedly promoted at work, builds a stronger bond with his friends, meets several new people, and successfully battles his depression.

Once Carl renounces his pessimism, Yes Man shifts into slapstick overdrive, observing Carl as he gets entangled in amusing situations as a "yes man." He faces challenges ranging from the hilarious (a Harry Potter party) to the downright icky (accepting a sexual favour from an elderly neighbour). The second act is agreeably light-hearted as a result, building a buoyant romance between Carl and Allison, and delivering a healthy dosage of laughs as it moves along at a brisk pace. Eventually the fun is compromised, though, when the movie culminates with a clichéd final act, becoming mired in a mundane break-up-to-make-up scenario. Yes Man remains eminently watchable even at its weakest, but it is slightly disappointing that the movie elects this route. In addition, there is a bit of wasted potential here. With the central premise in play, Carl could have gotten himself into any number of additional situations, especially since the novel actually contained more material. However, there is only so much a single film can contain, and director Peyton Reed keeps the picture on a tight leash throughout its 100-minute runtime.

Amid the silliness, the screenplay - credited to Nicholas Stoller (Forgetting Sarah Marshall), Jared Paul, and Andrew Mogel - has a couple of worthwhile messages to impart: get the most out of life, and be nice to your peers. In fact, while not exactly a profound film, it may leave you pondering all of your recent no's. And who knows, maybe you will choose to become a yes man yourself by the film's end (like this reviewer). Another huge benefit is the songs, some of which were provided by the alternative rock group Eels, while other tracks were performed by Deschanel and her band in the film, Munchausen by Proxy (the coolest band name in history). The songs are catchy, making the flick all the more fun and oddball. Yes Man's eye-watering $70 million budget was put to smart use, as the technical presentation is slick and colourful.

For his performance, Carrey is more restrained than usual, and his character comes across as genuinely likable once he becomes a yes man. His rubber face and manic energy are welcome here, and his enthusiasm helps to sell the jokes. Meanwhile, the impossibly gorgeous and lovely Deschanel (The Happening) represents the film's secret weapon. The actress shrewdly avoids overacting - she's low-key, letting her expressive eyes convey her character's emotions. Furthermore, her singing voice is utterly angelic. The success of any romantic comedy depends on the two leads, and fortunately, even despite an eighteen-year age gap, Deschanel and Carrey share the chemistry necessary for the romance to gain traction. By the end, you'll be rooting for them to get together, which speaks volumes about the effectiveness of the central coupling. Meanwhile, the supporting cast is equally amenable. Cooper (who went on to star in 2009's monster hit The Hangover) and Masterson are likeable as Carl's all-too-tolerant friends, while Terrence Stamp is terrific in his smaller role as the inspiration guru behind the yes man phenomenon. However, New Zealand comedian Rhys Darby arguably makes the most positive impression. In his big-screen debut, Darby emanates charisma and comic energy, playing well alongside Carrey and stealing every scene that he's in.

At the end of the day, Yes Man is an amiable and entertaining feel-good romantic comedy which is never tedious, and is not coated in too much saccharine. The characters are endearing, the premise is intriguing, the gags are amusing, and it encourages its audience to get the most out of life. It's admittedly fluffy, but it's enjoyable fluff, and it's a great deal of fun. And considering the usual standard for contemporary comedies and rom-coms, this is high praise. Say "yes" to Yes Man.

7.2/10

Larger and more overblown in every aspect, except where it would be beneficial, Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen is the definitive portrait of Michael Bay at his most conceited and undisciplined. For this follow-up to 2007's Transformers, Bay and his screenwriters (Ehren Kruger, Roberto Orci and Alex Kurtzman) go haywire with excess, lathering this God-awful film in dumb humour and a dizzying amount of CGI. No coherent story ever emerges throughout Revenge of the Fallen - it is just a monotonous collection of generic explosions and robot battles that mimics storytelling without understanding it. Without any tension, downtime, warmth and any reason to care, all 150 goddamn minutes of Revenge of the Fallen represent an audio-visual assault on all senses (including common) that rapidly becomes excruciatingly boring.

Now...the story? Yeah, that's awful, too. Sam Witwicky (Shia LeBeouf) departs for college while the Autobots hunt the remaining Decepticons. When Sam conveniently finds a shard of the Allspark in his jumper, his brain is flash-loaded with a bunch of ancient symbols about the location of a deadly machine that will let the bad guys destroy our sun for reasons too stupid to explain. Megatron (Hugo Weaving) is soon hauled out of his deep sea tomb (where he was dumped as part of the military strategy to set up a sequel) and revived before being placed in the service of the Fallen - i.e. "The First Decepticon": a being so important that nobody bothered mentioning him in the first film. The plot more or less concerns Sam going all crazy as the symbols overwhelm his brain and the robots pound on one another. Sam and his pals also meet a government agent (John Turturro), after which they all travel to Egypt, where the pyramids are...because that's what happens when you let a bunch of geographically challenged idiots make a $200 million blockbuster.

At one stage, John Turturro asks a Transformer, "Beginning. Middle. End. Facts. Details. Condense. Plot. Tell it." - I'd like to ask the screenwriters the same thing.

This sequel accentuates the blunders of 2007's Transformers, while the very limited charms of the original are gone, resulting in an utterly unredeemable pile of shit. Seriously, the film represents the cinematic equivalent of being stuck behind a screaming infant on an aeroplane. I have news for Michael Bay: a perpetual string of chaotic money shots robs each action sequence of weight, emotion, heart and impact. Furthermore, Bay pads out the straightforward plot to an unholy two-and-a-half hours, meaning the picture is packed with gratuitous filler. For instance, there's a subplot in which Sam and his girlfriend (Megan Fox) are too nervous to say "I love you" to one another...until, of course, the climax - a law straight out of the Screenwriting 101 handbook. By the time the climactic battle between the Autobots, Decepticons, Otherbots (???) and the U.S. Army arrives, there's a good chance you will be too numbed and fatigued to actually give a fuck about how it will end. Aren't movies like this against the Geneva Convention?

For reasons completely beyond this reviewer's mental perimeters, greater emphasis is placed on comedy for Revenge of the Fallen. Therefore, the dead space between the action is filled with rear nudity from Turturro, Autobots who trigger uncomfortable memories of Jar Jar Binks, significantly more time with Sam's obnoxiously unfunny parents, and a Decepticon spy who likes to hump legs. Does the concept of a robot humping a woman's leg seem funny to you? Bay seems to think it is so hilarious that he also includes two scenes of dogs humping each other. A set of Transformer testicles also make an appearance, and there is an agonisingly long gag involving Sam's mother tripping out on pot brownies. And slutty chicks can transform into robots, too, because the film outright refuses to make any goddamn sense. If Bay had another ten million to spend, he probably would've put in a Transformer sex scene or some form of musical number.

The action is relentlessly tedious and repetitious. Robots battle other robots, humans use firepower against robots (though never in the history of cinema has artillery ever actually harmed alien machinery), and so on. Worse, this film has over forty Transformers, reducing most of them to nothing more than interchangeable cannon fodder. Adding to the confusion, the Transformers are similar in design, not to mention they are poorly defined and make absolutely no visual sense (a car can transform into a robot a few storeys tall?!). Combined with the director's typical routine of quick-cutting and shaky cam, it is impossible to tell what the fuck is happening during the battles, each of which ultimately amounts to a nauseating, incomprehensible blur of confusion. The results are frustrating, and one will struggle to figure out what's happening instead of relaxing and enjoying. It's like watching paint dry while someone whacks you over the head with a baseball bat and another person whacks a couple of frying pans together! Additionally, the digital effects are mixed. On the one hand, some of the technical prowess is laudable, but on the other hand, the digitally-created Transformers are often cartoonishly and haphazardly integrated into the live-action footage.

Naturally, the humans suck, too, with the characters ranging from obnoxious to pointless. Every role amounts to a bland cipher, and when they aren't delivering witless dialogue or spouting tiresome exposition, they are running away from explosions in slow motion. Megan Fox's character is particularly superfluous - she serves no purpose in the story and is there just because she's hot. The camera spends so much time ogling her torso that one must wonder if 13-year-old boys were operating the camera. And no Michael Bay movie would be complete without the director's disturbing sense of reality. The women are all scorching hot supermodels masquerading as actors, and they love spreading their legs for nerds. Meanwhile, minorities conform to every stereotype imaginable and are best used as comic relief. Oh, and scenes set in a foreign country must depict the country's clichés - thus, there are mimes in France and camels in Egypt. Naturally, too, the American Armed Forces are fetishised, with the final act amounting to a patriotic army recruitment commercial.

Michael Bay is also patently in love with himself, and this love is on full display here for all to see. A large poster for Bad Boys II is seen in Sam's dorm room, and there are visual homages, as well. For example, fiery objects destroying buildings in Paris look similar to Armageddon, while the destruction of an aircraft carrier appears to be a nod to Pearl Harbor.

Fans of this woeful picture can only say a couple of things in the film's defence: it's entertaining, and the special effects are amazing. But the latter is arguable, and the former is merely a subjective opinion. Every summer blockbuster has big special effects and action...Revenge of the Fallen is just a tired, boring rehash of action movie conventions without an ounce of humanity, and it embodies every negative aspect of summer blockbusters. I understand that Transformers movies flourish at the box office and that blockbusters like this appeal to a certain demographic. And that's fine - but can those who like this crap please just realise that they are an idiot?

1.2/10

Check out [Link removed - login to see] - it pretty much sums up everything that's wrong with this flick...in words funnier than mine.

Taking a heavy dose of influence from 1970's cop flicks as well as employing elements of modern action films (with a bit of Grimm's Fairy Tales also in the mix), Wayne Kramer's Running Scared is a hard-hitting, visceral, over-the-top extravaganza of blood and bullets that never lulls for a moment. With his second major movie, writer-director Kramer has delivered a non-stop action powerhouse packed with brutal violence, nightmarish caricatures, gun-toting kids, washing machine cunnilingus and enough f-bombs to make Martin Scorsese blush. It's also laden with pointless-yet-cool camera tricks and a crazily contorted plot structure. In a nutshell: Running Scared is an outrageous catalogue of action movie tricks presented by a director who's clearly having fun sampling from the genre salad bar. This ain't a movie for squeamish or those sensitive to gratuitous violence, but Running Scared is highly recommended if you have a taste for stylish filmmaking and gritty realism - it will leave you breathless.

The less written about this film's storyline, the better. In the simplest words possible, the story concerns a low-level gangster named Joey Gazelle (Walker). Following a botched drug deal that results in the deaths of several corrupt cops, Joey is tasked with disposing the guns used during the shootout. But before he can dispose of the guns, one of them is stolen by a young boy named Oleg (Bright) who uses it to shoot his abusive father (Roden). This gun becomes a MacGuffin which sets things in motion. Throughout the course of one night, Joey has to find the gun as well as Oleg. What follows can be described rather accurately as a feverish fairy tale told in the backdrop of a nihilistic and violent underworld.

Running Scared begins with an eye-popping, violent action sequence that's part True Romance, part Lethal Weapon and part The Matrix. With frenetic camera work, quick edits, slow motion and blood aplenty, this is an ardently visual sequence. Action fanatics will certainly be pleased with this opening which also establishes a fitting "anything can happen" atmosphere. After this shootout, the story slows down in order to develop the characters. Once Oleg uses the gun, however, the film detonates with an exhilarating, kinetic energy. From there, Running Scared becomes a succession of encounters, each one growing more bizarre and overblown. Much of this flick exists in an almost dream-like state, with sequences bordering on surrealism. The screen drips with sweat and blood with scene after scene of relentless brutality. Joey and Oleg's trip down the rabbit hole (if you will) is a despairingly dark odyssey of crime and suspense that culminates in an amazingly violent climax for which all bets are off.

Writer-director Wayne Kramer previously directed the somewhat low-key 2003 film The Cooler, hence Running Scared is a surprise in terms of style. For this film, Kramer adds a multitude of visual tricks that amplify the nightmarish atmosphere. Jim Whitaker's cinematography is equally astounding - with a desaturated colour palette of rich, grimy lustre and a number of magnificent, digitally-enhanced images, the filmmakers have achieved a true comic-book mood in the vein of Sin City and Kiss Kiss Bang Bang. This is all topped off with Mark Isham's top-flight score. Director Kramer also truly tests the boundaries for his film's R rating - on top of the orgy of ultra-violence, profanity is plentiful and there are a few full frontal nude shots.

Running Scared is not without its faults, however - the storyline is confusing, with plot holes and unbelievably contrivances galore. The dialogue alternates between outrageously profane and unbelievable, and a lot of the characters are cardboard. Kramer also employs pretty much every crime film cliché in existence. But the visuals are so enthralling, the pacing is so frenetic and the action is so involving that the film only falls apart in retrospect. There are probably too many endings as well, but Running Scared nevertheless remains a deliriously off-beat, psychotic action flick that entertains mightily.

Paul Walker is one of the movie's greatest strengths. The hard-edged, scared-to-death persona of Joey perfectly suits Walker - he does plenty of running, jumping, shooting and swearing with grit and believability backing up his actions. Even better, the actor manages to sell panic better than one would expect judging from his past work (movies like The Fast and the Furious). The children (Cameron Bright and Alex Neuberger) submit solid work, while the villains (such as Chazz Palminteri, Karel Roden and Johnny Messner) exude malice. As the ever-devoted wife of Joey, there's Vera Farmiga who steals every scene. She even gets a subplot of her own - one which clearly indicates that Running Scared is more of a pulpy comic book or a grim neo-fairytale.

Running Scared is best described as an adult fairytale since writer-director Wayne Kramer blends conventional action-adventure aesthetics with the fantastic and the mythic. So much crazy stuff occurs during the course of Joey's outlandish night that the film frequently feels like a "greatest hits" collection of action flick lunacy. Best of all, Running Scared moves at such a lightning pace that one can easily overlook the preposterousness of the whole enterprise.

8.3/10

John Woo's Hard Boiled is a scrumptious feast for action lovers - an explosively visceral, operatic tour de force of amazingly choreographed violence and blistering pyrotechnics that's iced with Woo trademarks. At its core the film is a fairly standard cop drama with a limp emotional hook and cardboard characters, but with action extraordinaire John Woo at the helm, Hard Boiled is pumped up several notches. Woo grasps the conventional framework of an over-the-top action-thriller before adding a dense layer of visual artistry which is supplemented with meticulous choreography and the visceral punch of innocents in harm's way. Altogether, it's the perfect recipe for a John Woo actioner, and if this isn't his masterpiece then it certainly represents the director well enough.

Hard Boiled introduces us to tough-as-nails Hong Kong inspector 'Tequila' Yuen. At the beginning of the film, Tequila loses his partner in a shootout with a ruthless local triad gang. Determined to settle the score with these gun smugglers, Tequila reluctantly partners up with undercover police officer Tony (Leung) who has infiltrated the Hong Kong Triads. As Tony and Tequila work to crack the gun-running case, there are countless chest-thumping gun battles mixed with some halfway decent character development on top of an interesting subplot concerning paper cranes.

More than anything else, Hard Boiled is anchored firmly in place by the jaw-dropping action. Countless bullets are discharged throughout the film as the duo of heroes battle literally hundreds of henchmen. The key action sequences in Hard Boiled can be instantly recalled just by naming the location in which they transpire (the tea house, the warehouse, and so on). The shootouts never lack energy and never fail to astonish - the opening gunfight itself would be a worthy climax for any American actioner. The entire final half an hour of the feature is one long, breathtaking action set-piece within a hospital which moves briskly from one tense confrontation/shootout to another. There's one particularly stunning shot during the hospital sequence that lasts almost three minutes and follows Tequila & Tony as they dispatch a multitude of henchmen. In excess of 100,000 rounds of blank ammunition were reportedly expended during the production of the film. Interestingly, even despite the nonstop gun battles, we hardly ever see any characters reloading...

Director Woo employs close-ups, quick cuts, slow-motion, and insane tracking shots to weave in and out of the action. As a result, a viewer can easily become enthralled by the intense carnage. Unlike most other action directors, Woo understands one crucial thing - the geography of an action sequence. Woo's cinematography is smooth and steady as opposed to over-edited and shaky (like the director's successors). Meanwhile the score is both eerie and adrenaline-pumping, and the editing is sharp. Credit is also due to those who designed + created the sets - every location which houses an action sequence is blown to pieces for our viewing pleasure. The mayhem is simply awesome! On top of the competent craftsmanship, there's some sly humour tossed into the mix as well. A special mention should be made about the body count for this flick - according to multiple websites, Hard Boiled dishes out 307 bodies in total (146 during the hospital sequence alone).

Woo has two exceptional actors in Chow Yun-Fat and Tony Leung, who help prevent the film from diving into deep melodrama. Hard Boiled is marred by one factor, however: Tequila is never developed as a flesh-and-blood character. Tequila is just Chow Yun-Fat, the Asian Arnold Schwarzenegger - he's a mere cardboard cut-out with nothing more behind him. Were it not for the fact that Tony Leung's character is thoroughly developed and that the action truly kicks ass, Hard Boiled would just be another disposable actioner.

Prior to director John Woo's Hollywood conversion (resulting in excellent films like Face/Off, as well as duds in the form of Paycheck, Windtalkers and Mission: Impossible II), the man crafted a number of classic action films. Hard Boiled is arguably the best of the bunch. It's thin on plot, it's definitely silly, and it lacks an emotional hook, but it's the action and the top-notch filmmaking that deserves recognition here. From start to finish, dull moments are few and far between - and at over two hours in length, that's quite an achievement. Hard Boiled is also an essential motion picture which helped revolutionise the action genre for the subsequent generation - films like The Matrix owe their success and superb shootouts to this John Woo classic. You're simply not an action enthusiast unless you're familiar with Hard Boiled.

8.2/10

Deborah Kampmeier's much-hyped Hounddog premiered at the 2007 Sundance Film Festival to a disastrous reception. Following its derailment at the festival, the film was subsequently recut and revised before being given a brief, unsuccessful theatrical release almost two years afterwards. But make no mistake...even the amended version of this humid drama is thoroughly awful. Although writer-director Kampmeier tried to get this project off the ground for a decade, Hounddog - unofficially known as The Dakota Fanning Rape Movie - feels tailor-made to be a vehicle for young Dakota Fanning who clearly desires to transition from kid roles to more dramatic material via this controversial drama. Unfortunately, this is just a heavy-handed, overwrought feature that isn't nearly as powerful or as provocative as it clearly strives to be. Hollow, unbelievably clichéd, unappealing, and unable to convey a worthwhile message, Hounddog is a handsomely-produced but unintentionally risible film.

Taking place in Alabama (although it was filmed in North Carolina) during the late 1950s, the story follows a precious young free spirit named Lewellen (Fanning). A pre-teen on the verge of womanhood, Lewellen is unaware of her burgeoning sexuality as she attracts the attention of lecherous boys while attempting to sort out her domestic troubles. The troubled 12-year-old girl only finds solace from her abusive life through blues music - namely Elvis Presley, whose songs she keenly sings and dances along to.

If there's one thing Hounddog does correctly, it's the recreation of the American South during the 1950s. The striking visuals are evocative of rural living, and the soundtrack (alive with the sounds of locusts and grasshoppers, in addition to a cocktail of classic music) are able to pull a viewer in. Unfortunately, though, Kampmeier has no idea what to do with an audience once they've become immersed in her world. The key flaw is that the story doesn't have anything valuable to say. Moreover, Lewellen never acts like a prepubescent girl - she's a writer's construct as opposed to a living, breathing human being.

Essentially a coming-of-age tale, Hounddog is an extremely episodic drama that bounces all over Lewellen's world in increasingly irritating and unintentionally funny ways. The loss of innocence is supposedly the main vein of thematic exploration for this feature, but Kampmeier simply isn't focused or talented enough to effectively pull it off as she struggles to cover the large canvas of Lewellen's family woes. Clichés plague the screenplay as well. With plenty of painfully "symbolic" snakes, a jovial African American who can offer homespun wisdom at the drop of a hat, and predatory boys who rape young girls, it's doubtful there's a Southern cliché that the writer-director misses!

The first two thirds of Hounddog are incredibly unfocused and grow increasingly boring. Kampmeier continues to throw in pointless distractions rather than focusing on developing a semblance of a narrative. Such distractions include the arrival of a snobby rich girl, as well as the tragedy that befalls Lewellen's father when (in an unintentionally comic moment) lightning strikes his tractor and he's turned into a childlike invalid. Eventually those who know what's coming will find themselves in the decidedly peculiar position of impatiently awaiting the rape of Lewellen, hoping the scene will get things moving. The rape scene arrives after roughly an hour, and is shown with sufficient restraint to deflect a lot of the criticism it received. There's nothing gratuitous or exploitative about this particular scene; it's presented as tastefully as possible while still conveying the horror of the act. (Kampmeier does cross the line, however, with a silly Jesus reference: Lewellen's palm is cut by a nail).

After the rape scene, Kampmeier's movie stumbles from one unlikely story development to the next, and is packed with further distractions (such as the return of a character who wants custody of Lewellen). There's no compelling portrait of Lewellen as she struggles to deal with the trauma. The film never deeply explores the character...she's ashamed and her spirit is broken - that's about all we get. An unnecessary plethora of subplots are added instead - there's some mystical mumbo-jumbo involving snakes, and an all-knowing Negro who soothes Lewellen's spirit with his words of healing and blues music. How does that solve the problem? At the end of the day, Hounddog is just utterly uninvolving and asinine.

More than anything else, Hounddog is a film that allows Dakota Fanning the rare opportunity to convey a tremendous range of emotions in an Oscar-baiting performance. Fanning is the best thing about this otherwise cold fish of a motion picture. The only other actor worth mentioning is David Morse as Lewellen's father. Morse, already a cringingly limited actor, just does his best Forrest Gump impression after his character is struck by lightning. He ludicrously overplays his character's mental reduction, to the point that one will likely be reminded of Robert Downey Jr.'s speech in Tropic Thunder regarding the perils facing an actor who goes "full retard."

Hounddog is merely a string of vignettes - there's no coherent or compelling story, and it loses power as a result. The controversial rape scene is the only moment in Hounddog that's genuinely effective because it is the only time that writer-director Deborah Kampmeier had a solid idea of what she wanted to say. In spite of a few scenes of utter greatness, this motion picture as a whole is an unmitigated mess. If there was genuine heart and passion behind this film, Hounddog could've become the genuinely moving and powerful drama that it wanted to be rather than the maudlin, silly mess it ended up becoming.

4.7/10