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All reviews - Movies (1553) - TV Shows (38) - DVDs (2)

A wasted opportunity.

Posted : 15 years, 11 months ago on 26 April 2008 01:50 (A review of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory)

"Everything in this room is eatable, even I'm eatable! But that is called "cannibalism," my dear children, and is in fact frowned upon in most societies."

This new version of the classic children's fantasy book had everything going for it: Tim Burton was helming the project, Johnny Depp is in the lead role, special effects were updated and improved, a great cast and impressive production values. What could go wrong, right?

A lot, apparently.

Sure, visually the film is stunning, but did anyone take a moment to consider a better script? Burton has paid more attention on the production design and visual effects as opposed to the script, character development and doing justice to the source material.

For starters the film is unnecessarily lengthy and corny at times, with new things being added and classic things from the book being removed. They actually didn't include Charlie's sin with the fizzy drinks! That was what made the original so innovative and exciting, but above all made Charlie a lot more human. It was a great part and a great concept as well. Instead they add a scene of what happens to the children + parents after leaving the factory. This doesn't do anything for the plot and is completely unnecessary.

What's more - there are pointless flashbacks of Willy Wonka's early days that make the film even longer than it already should be. The flashbacks were nothing more than an excuse for Burton to bring Christopher Lee into the picture. These flashbacks also kill all the mystery surrounding Willy Wonka that made me love the original book and movie in the first place! The flashbacks slow down the pacing as well. On the subject of pacing, the film's ending was an unnecessary detour into clichéd territory. Work needed to be done in that aspect.

Anyway, the film is a retelling of the classic Roald Dahl children's tale. Willy Wonka (Depp), the mysterious chocolate maker, had closed his factory for 20 years but decides to reopen it temporarily for 5 lucky children who find a golden ticket inside a Wonka chocolate bar.

That's pretty much the spoiler-free synopsis. Johnny Depp is an amazing actor (and, for the sake of the Depp lovers who may be reading this, attractive) and his version of the character is adorable. I will admit that he seems a little out of place in relation to the timeline. (He doesn't look a day over 35, but yet the factory was closed for 20 years...was he a teenager when he opened it?!) Depp gives the film its moments of comedic genius. I loved the hilarious dialogue he delivers throughout the movie. His lines are continually quotable, albeit childish. He continues to remind us all why he is the greatest actor of all time.

Freddie Highmore just isn't a very good Charlie Bucket, unfortunately. His lines sounded horrendously contrived. He's cute, but can't act.

Danny Elfman's score is one of the film's redeeming features. His score is evocative and exciting. Maybe a little bit too pleonastic but still enough to trigger one's imagination.

Tim Burton is one of my favourite directors of all time. The production design was lavish and attractive, with special effects that look extraordinary. Is there anything else to expect from a Burton movie? The man is a visionary and when I heard he was helming this project I felt relieved as he was talking about "how faithful to the source material" it would be. So why did he lie?

I'm sorry, Tim, but you missed the mark completely here. Only watch this one for the impressive, updated special effects and Depp as a better Willy Wonka.

In a nutshell: Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is a wasted opportunity. From a technical standpoint the film is flawless. There are a few actors that look out of place; however the film boasts production design that is delightful to exhibit.


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So bad it's hilarious!

Posted : 15 years, 11 months ago on 26 April 2008 01:24 (A review of Plan 9 from Outer Space)

"Perhaps, on your way home, someone will pass you in the dark, and you will never know it... for they will be from outer space."

Hailed as the worst film of all time, I generally tend to agree.

Wood has been famous for the way he makes films; be it the obvious fake props, the horrible screenplays or the hideous special effects used,

Wood put his mark on Hollywood as the worst film director in the history of mankind. Now I would agree with that statement, however it seems Uwe Boll has taken that place from Wood. Wood is better than Boll in ever way; Wood was a respectable person (Just watch Ed Wood, the Tim Burton film) whereas Boll needs his head checked and needs to be shot.

Plan 9 From Outer Space is one of the fakest films ever seen, and basically every scene looks so fake it's distracting! Cardboard tombstones, obvious painted backgrounds, etc.

So, anyway, in the film a bunch of aliens (Who look like humans, sound like humans and speak perfect English) instigate a plan where they will resurrect dead humans as vampires and zombies, controlling them with electronic doohickies, to prevent mankind from creating a Solaranite (A type of bomb).

The plot, the script, the direction, the special effects and everything else in this mess are laughably appalling. The film is so bad it's good and turns itself into a comedy. It really seems like a comedy, and nothing looks realistic! What's more - Bela Lugosi died a few days into filming and was replaced with a non-actor chiropractor who bears no resemblance to Bela, is taller than him and wears a mask across his face that makes the film even more laughable!

Yet despite all the horrendous ingredients in this mess; Plan 9 From Outer Space can be incredibly entertaining and essential viewing.


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Trademark terrible movie.

Posted : 15 years, 11 months ago on 26 April 2008 01:20 (A review of Bride of the Monster (1955))

"A race of atomic supermen that will conquer the world!" as quoted by Bela Lugosi's character in another of Ed Wood's famously appalling films.

That quote pretty much sums up the plot...and the absolutely appalling screenplay.

Bride of the Monster is about a crazed doctor named Eric Vornoff who is experimenting with people to create his own "master race" of atomic people to rule the world.

Premise is weak, and executed appallingly! Performances are just woeful, with Lugosi visibly past his prime, Tor Johnson doing nothing more than zombie sleep-walking and a bit of roaring, and there's a few others that do nothing more than winge and moan, and add nothing to the story.

Script is horrible...I mean how did the actors ever agree to say such lines?! And the octopus...well it's so rubber and fake I believe even a novelty store would be fiercely ashmed to so much as glance at it. The attacking scenes...laughable. The opening attack scene was just dismal, with bad editing, bad acting and above all no believability at all.

The octopus never so much as touches the guy. All other attacks throughout the film are even worse...with an actor happily sitting amongst the tenticles and pulling the lifeless tenticles onto themself.

And don't get me started on the alligator...that scene was even worse. It was different in every shot, and is never seen in the same frame as the actor.

And what's more - a snake that looks out of place and suddenly turns all stiff and rubber a second before it's killed.

Regular on set goofs are visible, with shaking sets, and fake looking props. Heck, even when things get shot there's not so much as a bullet mark on them.

Those who've seen Tim Burton's biopic of Ed Wood will be familiar with the offscreen misadventures the crew faced.

The film is another trademark bad movie from Ed Wood...so bad it's very watchable and extremely funny at times. I watched it for its comedic entertainment value, and that's the only reason anyone should watch it.


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Classic Ed Wood turkey.

Posted : 15 years, 11 months ago on 26 April 2008 01:12 (A review of Glen or Glenda (1953))

"Beware! Beware of the big green dragon that sits on your doorstep. He eats little boys... Puppy dog tails, and BIG FAT SNAILS... Beware... Take care... Beware!"


Glen or Glenda is the first movie by the world's worst director (of that time, that is) and has been hailed by many as the worst movie of all time.

Imaginative "docu-fantasy" has an interesting premise of examining cross-dressing transvestites...but it's Ed's horrible directing, terrible screenwriting, and above all the actor's appalling performances that made this film such a turkey.

Ed Wood stars (under the name of Daniel Davis) as a heterosexual transvestite who is trying to find the right time to reveal to his fiancée Barbara (Fuller) that he enjoys wearing women's clothing, and has been longing to wear her sweater.

The titles at the beginning, revealing that the film features some people who are actually transvestites, is very true for director Ed Wood as he plays a transvestite and was in reality a transvestite (as revealed in Tim Burton's much loved film Ed Wood).

The film examines traits of transvestites, and is narrated appallingly by Bela Lugosi. The use of terribly executed dream sequences (that are long, drawn out, boring, and unnecessary) and stock footage (that is obviously repeated more than once) adds to the already dismal movie...but it's so funny and must be seen to be believed.

The performances (every single one) are played out straight, but the actors are just saying lines without any degree of realism or tension, and they are seemingly played out for laughs.

And as for Bela Lugosi...well his career was long dead before he decided to star in this turkey. His use of the word "Bevare!" on many occasions would be warning enough to the viewing audience who decided to watch this flick.

Overall, Glen or Glenda is just plain appalling and is good for nothing than a few laughs. Sure, the premise is interesting and it reveals some worthwhile information...but the script, directing and acting are all as shocking as the facts revealed.



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100% pure adrenaline!

Posted : 15 years, 11 months ago on 26 April 2008 01:08 (A review of Point Break)

"Fear causes hesitation, and hesitation will cause your worst fears to come true."


Point Break is simply a classic, highly entertaining action flick aimed at the mass market.

Keanu is new FBI agent recruit Johnny Utah. Young and ready for action, Utah is transferred to the band robbery division.

His first assignment is to investigate a string of bank robberies in Southern California that have been committed by a gang who call themselves 'The Ex-Presidents'. Going undercover, Utah infiltrates a group of surfers lead by surfer guru Bodhi (Swayze) and slowly learns to respect their lifestyle. These surfers are suspects in the investigation, so Utah must choose between his new friends or his duty that he has sworn to complete.

By this point in his career, Keanu Reeves still needed a few more acting lessons. For the most part he's incredibly wooden and lacking any emotion; spitting out words that sound rehearsed and unnatural.

Patrick Swayze was actually really good here. Thank God someone of Swayze's stature appeared in this movie. He almost manages to make up for Reeves' corny acting.

For an action movie, the script isn't too bad. Granted the film moves from cliché to cliché, and is very predictable...but at least it's entertaining!

The high energy action scenes make for essential viewing, especially for those who enjoy the genre.

Point Break is an action movie mixed with some energetic scenes of surfing. Some of the cinematography during the surfing scenes is fantastic, and the film is generally very entertaining.

It was great to see some characters pop up in Australia at the end. Worth a screening.



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Engrossing period piece!

Posted : 15 years, 11 months ago on 26 April 2008 01:03 (A review of The Libertine)

"The entire piece has been devised with the French in mind. In France, fornication in the streets with total strangers is compulsory."


The Libertine is a criminally underrated drama set during the 17th century. The film tells the fascinating latter life tale of the 2nd Earl of Rochester, John Wilmot (Depp).

During the period in which he lived, society was obsessed with everything sex related; whores were all over the streets, men cheated on their wives at brothels, etc. Wilmot was a man who was completely obsessed with sex (as told in the opening prologue; he is up for it "at any time" and with any gender).

The film examines the passionate romance Wilmot had with a young actress named Elizabeth Barry (Morton), and the phase Wilmot had with poetry.

Johnny Depp's performance is sensational like always; he plays his role to perfection, displaying depth and serious talent. Samantha Morton and Rosamund Pike are both extremely good as well; they both portray love interests for Wilmot. John Malkovich is also thrown into the mix here as well, playing yet another memorable character.

The Libertine is a very unique, one-of-a-kind movie. Throughout the running time, there is non-stop explicit sexual dialogue and frequent uses of quite shocking words (the c-word is used very often here), not to mention very sensual scenes including brief nudity and very mature themes.

Wilmot's story is one of self-betrayal, squandered talents and unrealised potential. If he had focused more on realising his potential as a writer, he could have been another Shakespeare. Instead his life was dedicated to sex and little else.

The Libertine is not a movie for all tastes. Many scenes include sickening dialogue, disturbing imagery and explicit language. Many people dislike it due to this fact, but this was the lifestyle of the people during the 17th century; alcohol, sex, bad language.

Having said that, the film is extremely funny at times and has a great deal of surprises along the way. The fascinating storytelling makes this very worthwhile viewing. I recommend the movie; it's very entertaining, very poignant and very well made.



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Provocative mystery...

Posted : 15 years, 11 months ago on 26 April 2008 09:20 (A review of In the Heat of the Night)

"They call me MISTER Tibbs!"


In the Heat of the Night is a genuine classic and one of the greatest films of the 1960s. The film is a provocative, enthralling mystery thriller that is atmospheric and entertaining.

The years have not dissipated the film's original impact in the slightest. The racial issues conveyed through the discriminatory characters are exact. At the time of the film's release, which was during the time when African Americans were fighting against racism, these were the typical police officers that you'd find on the streets. As one who has studied the decade in detail I can say without a shadow of a doubt that the period is portrayed with a great degree of realism.

In the 60s the film was an accurate representation of the time; now the film is timeless and a nostalgic trip back in time.

Sidney Poitier plays an African American homicide detective named Virgil Tibbs who becomes inadvertently embroiled in the murder investigation of a prominent businessman.

Tibbs is waiting for a train while police are searching for suspects. Due to the high level of racism he is first accused of the crime - then he is asked to solve it! The policemen that Tibbs finds himself working with are very unsupportive due to the colour of his skin. And hence as Tibbs attempts to find the killer it becomes a difficult task. But in order to solve the case they are forced to put their prejudices and differences aside, and join forces in a race against time to uncover the shocking truth.

In the Heat of the Night is a fantastic social commentary of the period of its release; it's also an unforgettable, enduring classic filled with fascinating characters to compliment the intriguing plot.

The experience is atmospheric, funny and engrossing. While watching the film I found it almost impossible to be bored.

Sidney Poitier's performance is triumphant and spellbinding. His character is shown to be smart and proficient when it comes to his profession. Poitier breaks through the conventions and stereotypes of African American characters; presenting the audience with something fresh and innovative. It's a shame the Academy overlooked Poitier for an Oscar.

Rod Steiger earned himself an Oscar for Best Actor as the racist Sherriff of the town of Sparta. There's little wonder as well. The rest of the policemen were conventional but real. At the time these were the people that policed the streets; lazy and quick to blame the closest black person in sight.

In the Heat of the Night delivers thoughtful, intelligent entertainment that is hard to beat. I personally didn't have much interest in watching the film. I ultimately loved it and detract all the negative things that I previously thought about it.

The film is a landmark production that is poignant and accurate. It's entertaining and confronting. Winner of 5 Oscars including Best Picture, Best Actor, Best Sound, Best Writing and Best Editing.



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A total riot! Brilliant!

Posted : 15 years, 11 months ago on 26 April 2008 08:46 (A review of Pee-wee's Big Adventure)

"I wouldn't sell my bike for all the money in the world. Not for a hundred million, trillion, billion dollars!"


Pee-wee's Big Adventure is Tim Burton's first feature length movie...and it is FANTASTIC!

From start to finish the film is a total riot. There are stacks of visual gags that had me in stitches, and a great script that also had me in stitches for every second of the running time. Tim Burton's visual imagination proves to be a perfect match for Pee-wee's fanciful exploits.

The whole movie is goofy, silly and just plain hilarious. Pee-wee Herman (Reubens, under the pseudonym of Pee-wee Herman) is simply a 9-year-old boy trapped in the body of an adult.

When his beloved bike is stolen one morning in broad daylight, Pee-wee embarks on a big adventure across the U.S. mainland in order to get it back.

I can't believe how underrated this movie is. Most people pass it off because of the silly title (as I did, but wanted to see it because of Tim Burton's involvement), but in all honesty the film is pure comic genius.

Reubens is absolutely hilarious in the title role. He always looks incredibly cute whenever he delivers a line, and his flamboyant antics had my sides aching with laughter.

The kids will absolutely adore this movie, and the adults might love it even more. While I was watching the movie it felt like it was okay to be a kid again. All the silly gags left my cheeks aching because of so much non-stop laughter and scenes filled with hilarity.

Face it, this isn't your usual Tim Burton movie and many will give it a pass because of this. But Burton's imagination, along with the witty screenplay penned with Paul Reubens among others, just makes for sensational entertainment.

Danny Elfman's score was just perfect here as well, and set the tone rather nicely. The bright music assisted in the film being as much fun as it is, especially during scenes that contain extensive visual gags. And the visual gags are so incredibly clever that it will take many viewings just to pick them all up.

Pee-wee's Big Adventure is little gem of a movie that you cannot afford to miss. The characters are quirky, the gags are cartoonish and the whole film is wildly inventive as well as being perfect entertainment for the whole family. This is a film that everyone can enjoy.



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Terrifying...brilliant...provocative!

Posted : 15 years, 11 months ago on 26 April 2008 08:42 (A review of Rosemary's Baby)

He chose you, honey! From all the women in the world to be the mother of his only living son!"

Roman Polanski's classic horror film Rosemary's Baby is the best and most terrifying supernatural horror film of all time bar none.

This movie is an example of the horror genre done right; there are spine-chilling moments, satanic images and horror themes that will stay with you forever.

A young couple named Rosemary (Farrow) and Guy (Cassavetes) move into a new apartment in the city of New York. The couple have plans of raising a family there, and start trying for a child.

But the two soon meet an elderly couple living in the same building who seem peculiar but caring. When Rosemary ends up pregnant, Guy strikes a deal with a group of devil worshippers unbeknownst to his wife. Rosemary's pregnancy is plagued by troubles - odd pains that last for extended periods of time, ill health and lack of good advice from the people around her.

Slowly, and surely, Rosemary learns to realise that she may be having the son of Satan.

Polanski has made this film nothing short of perfect - the film is effective, terrifying and spine-chilling. Some of the satanic images and black magic rituals will leave you terrified...and towards the end it's impossible to feel bored or to tear your eyes away from the screen.

The themes of witchcraft and devil worshipping are the icing on the cake. Mia Farrow's performance was astounding. It's obvious that she put everything she could into portraying such a pivotal character.

John Cassavetes is just brilliant here as well. He is able to play his character so well and believably. Both Ruth Gordon and Sidney Blackmer are superb as the very strange neighbours.

Rosemary's Baby is unmissable for any horror fan. It's incredibly creepy, atmospheric, eerie, brooding and creates an incredible sense of unthinkable danger.

Heck, Polanski even tops a bunch of Hitchcock's classic thrillers...and this is coming from someone who adores Hitchcock's work. Adapted from the novel by Ira Levin, and basically a modern take on demons and witchcraft.

In a nutshell, it's absolutely unthinkable to miss this movie. It's just an incredible experience and one of the most terrifying movies of all time.


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An underrated gem!

Posted : 15 years, 11 months ago on 26 April 2008 08:38 (A review of A Good Year)

"Thanks a million, Maximilian."

Ridley Scott was the perfect choice for the director for this absolutely sublime, entertaining drama.

I never really had an interest in seeing it because of the mediocre reviews it received, but it came as highly recommended by my uncle (a man obsessed with wine). I am extremely glad that I finally saw it.

Russell Crowe plays snobby expert businessman Max Skinner who has dedicated his life to his crucial career. Max learns that his uncle (Finney), a man who essentially raised him, had died and left him his French estate.

Max heads to France to visit the estate with intent to fix it up, and sell it. But once there, nostalgic memories are invoked when he views the estate and remembers all the great times he had with his uncle before he died.

There are many intriguing sub-plots that appear, but it's a lot more fun if I don't spoil it for you.

Russell Crowe's performance was absolutely exceptional. This isn't his usual performance, but rather an interesting twist and with a brilliant accent. This could well be his best performance to date.

Abbie Cornish was superb here. Her great acting skills really shine in her performance.

Albert Finney was also really, really great.

At a glance, not many people would expect someone like Ridley Scott to be at the helm, but his direction is absolutely perfect.

The score, though, just blew me away. The music was just perfect in every scene and set the atmosphere magnificently.

I can't believe how underrated and overlooked this movie is. It's such an underrated gem and one of the biggest surprises of 2006 for me. The film is extremely bright, well made, refreshing, charming and indescribably entertaining.

Marred only by a bit of a tedious ending. Other than that, A Good Year is a delightful way to spend the evening with the family. Highly recommended!


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