movie reviews by PvtCaboose91

"Beware! Beware of the big green dragon that sits on your doorstep. He eats little boys... Puppy dog tails, and BIG FAT SNAILS... Beware... Take care... Beware!"

Glen or Glenda is the first movie by the world's worst director (of that time, that is) and has been hailed by many as the worst movie of all time.

Imaginative "docu-fantasy" has an interesting premise of examining cross-dressing transvestites...but it's Ed's horrible directing, terrible screenwriting, and above all the actor's appalling performances that made this film such a turkey.

Ed Wood stars (under the name of Daniel Davis) as a heterosexual transvestite who is trying to find the right time to reveal to his fiancée Barbara (Fuller) that he enjoys wearing women's clothing, and has been longing to wear her sweater.

The titles at the beginning, revealing that the film features some people who are actually transvestites, is very true for director Ed Wood as he plays a transvestite and was in reality a transvestite (as revealed in Tim Burton's much loved film Ed Wood).

The film examines traits of transvestites, and is narrated appallingly by Bela Lugosi. The use of terribly executed dream sequences (that are long, drawn out, boring, and unnecessary) and stock footage (that is obviously repeated more than once) adds to the already dismal movie...but it's so funny and must be seen to be believed.

The performances (every single one) are played out straight, but the actors are just saying lines without any degree of realism or tension, and they are seemingly played out for laughs.

And as for Bela Lugosi...well his career was long dead before he decided to star in this turkey. His use of the word "Bevare!" on many occasions would be warning enough to the viewing audience who decided to watch this flick.

Overall, Glen or Glenda is just plain appalling and is good for nothing than a few laughs. Sure, the premise is interesting and it reveals some worthwhile information...but the script, directing and acting are all as shocking as the facts revealed.

"Fear causes hesitation, and hesitation will cause your worst fears to come true."

Point Break is simply a classic, highly entertaining action flick aimed at the mass market.

Keanu is new FBI agent recruit Johnny Utah. Young and ready for action, Utah is transferred to the band robbery division.

His first assignment is to investigate a string of bank robberies in Southern California that have been committed by a gang who call themselves 'The Ex-Presidents'. Going undercover, Utah infiltrates a group of surfers lead by surfer guru Bodhi (Swayze) and slowly learns to respect their lifestyle. These surfers are suspects in the investigation, so Utah must choose between his new friends or his duty that he has sworn to complete.

By this point in his career, Keanu Reeves still needed a few more acting lessons. For the most part he's incredibly wooden and lacking any emotion; spitting out words that sound rehearsed and unnatural.

Patrick Swayze was actually really good here. Thank God someone of Swayze's stature appeared in this movie. He almost manages to make up for Reeves' corny acting.

For an action movie, the script isn't too bad. Granted the film moves from cliché to cliché, and is very predictable...but at least it's entertaining!

The high energy action scenes make for essential viewing, especially for those who enjoy the genre.

Point Break is an action movie mixed with some energetic scenes of surfing. Some of the cinematography during the surfing scenes is fantastic, and the film is generally very entertaining.

It was great to see some characters pop up in Australia at the end. Worth a screening.

"The entire piece has been devised with the French in mind. In France, fornication in the streets with total strangers is compulsory."

The Libertine is a criminally underrated drama set during the 17th century. The film tells the fascinating latter life tale of the 2nd Earl of Rochester, John Wilmot (Depp).

During the period in which he lived, society was obsessed with everything sex related; whores were all over the streets, men cheated on their wives at brothels, etc. Wilmot was a man who was completely obsessed with sex (as told in the opening prologue; he is up for it "at any time" and with any gender).

The film examines the passionate romance Wilmot had with a young actress named Elizabeth Barry (Morton), and the phase Wilmot had with poetry.

Johnny Depp's performance is sensational like always; he plays his role to perfection, displaying depth and serious talent. Samantha Morton and Rosamund Pike are both extremely good as well; they both portray love interests for Wilmot. John Malkovich is also thrown into the mix here as well, playing yet another memorable character.

The Libertine is a very unique, one-of-a-kind movie. Throughout the running time, there is non-stop explicit sexual dialogue and frequent uses of quite shocking words (the c-word is used very often here), not to mention very sensual scenes including brief nudity and very mature themes.

Wilmot's story is one of self-betrayal, squandered talents and unrealised potential. If he had focused more on realising his potential as a writer, he could have been another Shakespeare. Instead his life was dedicated to sex and little else.

The Libertine is not a movie for all tastes. Many scenes include sickening dialogue, disturbing imagery and explicit language. Many people dislike it due to this fact, but this was the lifestyle of the people during the 17th century; alcohol, sex, bad language.

Having said that, the film is extremely funny at times and has a great deal of surprises along the way. The fascinating storytelling makes this very worthwhile viewing. I recommend the movie; it's very entertaining, very poignant and very well made.

"They call me MISTER Tibbs!"

In the Heat of the Night is a genuine classic and one of the greatest films of the 1960s. The film is a provocative, enthralling mystery thriller that is atmospheric and entertaining.

The years have not dissipated the film's original impact in the slightest. The racial issues conveyed through the discriminatory characters are exact. At the time of the film's release, which was during the time when African Americans were fighting against racism, these were the typical police officers that you'd find on the streets. As one who has studied the decade in detail I can say without a shadow of a doubt that the period is portrayed with a great degree of realism.

In the 60s the film was an accurate representation of the time; now the film is timeless and a nostalgic trip back in time.

Sidney Poitier plays an African American homicide detective named Virgil Tibbs who becomes inadvertently embroiled in the murder investigation of a prominent businessman.

Tibbs is waiting for a train while police are searching for suspects. Due to the high level of racism he is first accused of the crime - then he is asked to solve it! The policemen that Tibbs finds himself working with are very unsupportive due to the colour of his skin. And hence as Tibbs attempts to find the killer it becomes a difficult task. But in order to solve the case they are forced to put their prejudices and differences aside, and join forces in a race against time to uncover the shocking truth.

In the Heat of the Night is a fantastic social commentary of the period of its release; it's also an unforgettable, enduring classic filled with fascinating characters to compliment the intriguing plot.

The experience is atmospheric, funny and engrossing. While watching the film I found it almost impossible to be bored.

Sidney Poitier's performance is triumphant and spellbinding. His character is shown to be smart and proficient when it comes to his profession. Poitier breaks through the conventions and stereotypes of African American characters; presenting the audience with something fresh and innovative. It's a shame the Academy overlooked Poitier for an Oscar.

Rod Steiger earned himself an Oscar for Best Actor as the racist Sherriff of the town of Sparta. There's little wonder as well. The rest of the policemen were conventional but real. At the time these were the people that policed the streets; lazy and quick to blame the closest black person in sight.

In the Heat of the Night delivers thoughtful, intelligent entertainment that is hard to beat. I personally didn't have much interest in watching the film. I ultimately loved it and detract all the negative things that I previously thought about it.

The film is a landmark production that is poignant and accurate. It's entertaining and confronting. Winner of 5 Oscars including Best Picture, Best Actor, Best Sound, Best Writing and Best Editing.

"I wouldn't sell my bike for all the money in the world. Not for a hundred million, trillion, billion dollars!"

Pee-wee's Big Adventure is Tim Burton's first feature length movie...and it is FANTASTIC!

From start to finish the film is a total riot. There are stacks of visual gags that had me in stitches, and a great script that also had me in stitches for every second of the running time. Tim Burton's visual imagination proves to be a perfect match for Pee-wee's fanciful exploits.

The whole movie is goofy, silly and just plain hilarious. Pee-wee Herman (Reubens, under the pseudonym of Pee-wee Herman) is simply a 9-year-old boy trapped in the body of an adult.

When his beloved bike is stolen one morning in broad daylight, Pee-wee embarks on a big adventure across the U.S. mainland in order to get it back.

I can't believe how underrated this movie is. Most people pass it off because of the silly title (as I did, but wanted to see it because of Tim Burton's involvement), but in all honesty the film is pure comic genius.

Reubens is absolutely hilarious in the title role. He always looks incredibly cute whenever he delivers a line, and his flamboyant antics had my sides aching with laughter.

The kids will absolutely adore this movie, and the adults might love it even more. While I was watching the movie it felt like it was okay to be a kid again. All the silly gags left my cheeks aching because of so much non-stop laughter and scenes filled with hilarity.

Face it, this isn't your usual Tim Burton movie and many will give it a pass because of this. But Burton's imagination, along with the witty screenplay penned with Paul Reubens among others, just makes for sensational entertainment.

Danny Elfman's score was just perfect here as well, and set the tone rather nicely. The bright music assisted in the film being as much fun as it is, especially during scenes that contain extensive visual gags. And the visual gags are so incredibly clever that it will take many viewings just to pick them all up.

Pee-wee's Big Adventure is little gem of a movie that you cannot afford to miss. The characters are quirky, the gags are cartoonish and the whole film is wildly inventive as well as being perfect entertainment for the whole family. This is a film that everyone can enjoy.

He chose you, honey! From all the women in the world to be the mother of his only living son!"

Roman Polanski's classic horror film Rosemary's Baby is the best and most terrifying supernatural horror film of all time bar none.

This movie is an example of the horror genre done right; there are spine-chilling moments, satanic images and horror themes that will stay with you forever.

A young couple named Rosemary (Farrow) and Guy (Cassavetes) move into a new apartment in the city of New York. The couple have plans of raising a family there, and start trying for a child.

But the two soon meet an elderly couple living in the same building who seem peculiar but caring. When Rosemary ends up pregnant, Guy strikes a deal with a group of devil worshippers unbeknownst to his wife. Rosemary's pregnancy is plagued by troubles - odd pains that last for extended periods of time, ill health and lack of good advice from the people around her.

Slowly, and surely, Rosemary learns to realise that she may be having the son of Satan.

Polanski has made this film nothing short of perfect - the film is effective, terrifying and spine-chilling. Some of the satanic images and black magic rituals will leave you terrified...and towards the end it's impossible to feel bored or to tear your eyes away from the screen.

The themes of witchcraft and devil worshipping are the icing on the cake. Mia Farrow's performance was astounding. It's obvious that she put everything she could into portraying such a pivotal character.

John Cassavetes is just brilliant here as well. He is able to play his character so well and believably. Both Ruth Gordon and Sidney Blackmer are superb as the very strange neighbours.

Rosemary's Baby is unmissable for any horror fan. It's incredibly creepy, atmospheric, eerie, brooding and creates an incredible sense of unthinkable danger.

Heck, Polanski even tops a bunch of Hitchcock's classic thrillers...and this is coming from someone who adores Hitchcock's work. Adapted from the novel by Ira Levin, and basically a modern take on demons and witchcraft.

In a nutshell, it's absolutely unthinkable to miss this movie. It's just an incredible experience and one of the most terrifying movies of all time.

"Thanks a million, Maximilian."

Ridley Scott was the perfect choice for the director for this absolutely sublime, entertaining drama.

I never really had an interest in seeing it because of the mediocre reviews it received, but it came as highly recommended by my uncle (a man obsessed with wine). I am extremely glad that I finally saw it.

Russell Crowe plays snobby expert businessman Max Skinner who has dedicated his life to his crucial career. Max learns that his uncle (Finney), a man who essentially raised him, had died and left him his French estate.

Max heads to France to visit the estate with intent to fix it up, and sell it. But once there, nostalgic memories are invoked when he views the estate and remembers all the great times he had with his uncle before he died.

There are many intriguing sub-plots that appear, but it's a lot more fun if I don't spoil it for you.

Russell Crowe's performance was absolutely exceptional. This isn't his usual performance, but rather an interesting twist and with a brilliant accent. This could well be his best performance to date.

Abbie Cornish was superb here. Her great acting skills really shine in her performance.

Albert Finney was also really, really great.

At a glance, not many people would expect someone like Ridley Scott to be at the helm, but his direction is absolutely perfect.

The score, though, just blew me away. The music was just perfect in every scene and set the atmosphere magnificently.

I can't believe how underrated and overlooked this movie is. It's such an underrated gem and one of the biggest surprises of 2006 for me. The film is extremely bright, well made, refreshing, charming and indescribably entertaining.

Marred only by a bit of a tedious ending. Other than that, A Good Year is a delightful way to spend the evening with the family. Highly recommended!

"Everything you create, you use to destroy."

I found The Fifth Element to be an extremely enjoyable and entertaining experience; without being the greatest sci-fi film ever, it's bucket loads of fun.

The plot is about a great evil that comes to Earth every 5000 years with the intent of destroying it. The only way to combat this evil is using four stones and a "fifth element", a perfect being.

In a colourful vision of the 23rd century, a N.Y.C. cab driver named Korben Dallas (Willis) comes into contact with the "fifth element", named Leeloo (Jovovich), who drops into his cab. Dallas is ex-military, and is called upon to battle the evil forces that descend upon Earth.

I will not waste your time writing a more elaborate plot synopsis, because if I did then I'd spoil the whole movie for you.

The film moves at a slick pace, and contains some absolutely outstanding visual effects and amazing set design. The vision of the future is just fantastic; many clever ideas, great designs and some of the best costumes you will ever see in a sci-fi movie.

Bruce Willis is in one of the best performances of his career. This can be classified as a Die Hard of the 23rd century due to the traits exhibited during the movie; he's in the wrong place at the wrong time, and gets mixed up in some rather large plot that threatens the lives of many. Willis was nothing short of exceptional.

I could barely recognise Milla Jovovich in some very exquisite costume design, and delivering such peculiar dialogue. Nevertheless, she is superb. Chris Tucker shines like always. He plays a flamboyant radio host who steals the spotlight in every scene he's in.

One of the film's biggest strengths was its sense of humour. Into the second half there's some great action mixed with a host of hilarious gags. Chris Tucker in particular is just downright side-splitting as always.

The great visual images are accompanied by an excellent score by Eric Serra.

The Fifth Element is nothing short of great entertainment. There's action, great sci-fi images, has some great humour mixed in...and it's just a whole lot of fun. Highly recommended.

"As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be a gangster."

Martin Scorsese is a director who will always be remembered for a long list of classic mob dramas. The beginning of his career was marked with the brilliant Taxi Driver. Since then, Scorsese has continued to produce great quality work. It's a rare occasion if he produces a faulty product.

GoodFellas is arguably Scorsese's best film to date; this slick, fast-paced crime drama is engrossing, captivating and riveting. Before GoodFellas many had regarded The Godfather to be the best mob drama in existence. Since the release of this film, that statement continues to spark debate.

GoodFellas is based on the true story about a gangster named Henry Hill (Liotta). As a teenage local boy Henry becomes part of the mafia. He becomes partners with gangsters Jimmy Conway (De Niro) and Tommy DeVito (Pesci). The film is a tale that follows this certain mafia family over the course of about 30 years; chronicling the rise and fall of Henry and his two counterparts.

Even with its 140-minute running time, GoodFellas is exceptionally told. The film encapsulates everything that should be present in the genre; strong characters, heavy profanity and lots of repulsive violence. Each performance is engaging and compelling with a smart script to boot.

The script is smart and enthralling. The whole film is told with outstanding voice-over narration that gets us into the mind of the character being portrayed.

This could be Robert De Niro's finest hour. His screen presence is brooding and unnerving. Because of his character's reputation there is good reason to fear him. De Niro plays Jimmy Conway as terrifying and intimidating.

Ray Liotta is a realistic gangster figure. At times his bitter anger seems very genuine. He spits out a tonne of profanity during the compelling drama that frequently occurs during the film's running time.

Joe Pesci pretty much stole the show. De Niro may be terrifying, but on the other hand Pesci is the epitome of sadistic gangsters. He frequently swears and cannot hold his temper. Whenever he's in a fit of rage it is quite menacing.

GoodFellas is a film that exposes gangsters for what they truly are - people who preach loyalties, respects and principles. But when it comes down to it they are just a bunch of two-bit criminals that will stab each other in the back for money, power or otherwise. They have an outward persona of being calm and tolerant. Underneath they are capable of incredible rage and are quite detestable people.

Martin Scorsese is very talented when he is at the helm of a mafia drama. His directing makes everything seem so authentic like it's actually happening. Of course this is the beauty of Scorsese's work - that nothing ever feels contrived or staged.

GoodFellas is an exceptional movie powered by remarkable performances and great directing. The R rating truly signifies the film's nature. The profanity levels are through the roof, the violence is off-putting, the experience is unnerving. But despite its ghastly nature the film is a brilliant mob drama. For aficionados of Scorsese or the genre, this is a must.

"Can't rain all the time..."

The Crow is a film I approached because of its cult following and massive popularity.

I had also heard of the tragic story regarding actor Brandon Lee during filming. For those of you who don't know said story, Lee tragically passed away before filming concluded. While a scene was being filmed a prop gun fired a live round into the actor, causing his imminent death.

Lee's death didn't prevent director Proyas from creating a remarkable action movie based on a series of comics. The Crow is a film with an atmosphere of dread and decay; its gothic set design and visuals look incredible.

The film is also quite repulsive and heavy. There are scenes showcasing heavy violence, strong profanity and disturbing images.

Brandon Lee plays Eric Draven. Eric is a musician who comes home on Devil's Night (a tradition among those who commit crime in the city) to find his fiancée Shelly (Shinas) being savagely beaten and raped. The hooligans kill Eric and Shelly that night.

One year later Eric returns as an invincible undead vigilante ready to avenge the death of his beloved Shelly. And so Eric hits the streets one night with plans to kill the group of urban criminals.

The simple plot is executed with phenomenal style; featuring amazing stunts, plenty of action and fascinating gothic imagery. This makes for a memorable movie experience.

Brandon Lee's final performance is unforgettable. When he becomes the invulnerable vigilante he seems relentless and evil. The beauty of his performance is that his character also has a softer side that is shown during flashbacks when his character was still alive. This softer side is also visible when he meets people from his past. It's hard to recognise him beneath the heavy make-up that almost looks like a darker version of The Joker.

The Crow also boasts an array of highly impressive visuals. The special effects are stunning to look at. The action scenes are complimented with these incredible special effects. Said effects also needed to be utilised to complete a few scenes that required the use of Brandon Lee's face after he had passed away.

Proyas establishes a tremendously sophisticated style throughout the film as well. There are fast flashy cuts and some bizarre uses of the camera. Needless to say, this added to the gothic feeling of the production. In addition, most of the movie takes place at night when it's raining quite heavily. The action scenes do feature some ultra fast cutting but the action is still dazzling and brutal; displaying a high level of graphic violence. This fast cutting isn't as distracting as the style used in modern action films.

One thing that I realised while watching the movie is the very little shadow detail during the darker scenes. I'm not sure if this can be attributed to a creative decision by the director or the transfer that was available to me. The visuals are accompanied by an aggressive soundtrack featuring some dynamic music. This is usually played over the action scenes. I thought the soundtrack was fantastic; keeping in the dark gothic atmosphere of the movie.

The Crow is an action film that is smart and taut; over its 95-minute running time I never found it at all boring. Some of the dialogue is a bit contrived and there are a few clichés, however the film is profoundly good entertainment. If you have not seen The Crow then I suggest you get your hands on a copy immediately.