Reviews by PvtCaboose91

Returning to the railroad for another train-in-peril movie after 2009's The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3 remake, director Tony Scott's Unstoppable is not an action-thriller in a typical sense. Instead of a brain-dead Michael Bay-esque blockbuster, this is a man-against-nature disaster movie more in the vein of something like Dante's Peak, though its story concerns characters trying to prevent an impending disaster rather than struggling to survive an unfolding one. It's a welcome change of pace for Scott, who took to the challenge with the highest confidence, crafting a marvellous white-knuckle popcorn thriller which moves at such a breakneck speed that its undernourished script barely matters. Inspired by true events, Unstoppable is one of the 2010's most satisfying surprises and one of the most technically accomplished blockbusters of the year.

It's the first day on the job for young train conductor Will Colson (Pine), who finds himself in a workplace of grizzled old veterans. Given a partner in the form of aging engineer Frank Barnes (Washington), the pair steadily cruise along the Pennsylvania rails as they get to know each other. But their day is interrupted when they learn that an unmanned freight train carrying toxic chemicals is out of control, zooming through the state towards the heavily-populated town of Stanton where a sharp curve could send it flying off the tracks. With the looming possibility of a huge disaster and thousands of innocent deaths, Frank and Will conceive of a plan to slow down the speeding death trap, though they face opposition from the company's corporate businessman who are more concerned about preserving stock prices.

Being that this is a mainstream Hollywood effort, screenwriter Mark Bomback (Live Free or Die Hard) altered parts of the historical record for dramatic reasons. (The true-life runaway train had a top speed of only 47 miles per hour, whereas Unstoppable's beast runs in excess of 70mph.) Additionally, Bomback heavily ladled on the clichés. Will, for instance, has an estranged wife and kid in the train's potential impact zone, while Frank is a grizzled veteran with a chance to prove his character, and (just for good measure) school kids on a field trip are momentarily included as a cheap device to build suspense. The narrative's outcome is highly predictable from the outset as well, though it feels wrong to begrudge the movie of this particular aspect because it is based on a true story and there's at least enough nail-biting intensity to make the ride a tad uncertain in the moment. What doesn't work, though, is the way the film constantly returns to thankless side characters and onlookers watching the events unfold on television. Too much of the on-screen happenings are shown through the lens of local news broadcasters who just state the bloody obvious. Perhaps this time would've been better spent building more heart or further exploring the characters.

Unstoppable's biggest asset is Tony Scott's filmmaking touch, as the picture carries the slick, professional look which has come to define the director's career. With Scott at the helm, the film is effortlessly exciting and incredibly intense. It's also nice to see that Scott dialled down his overblown visual style, though Unstoppable still carries his visual signature - there's a lot of sweeping dolly movement, the cinematography is zoom-happy, and the editing is at times hyperactive, but these techniques are not distracting. In fact, the style serves to permeate humdrum scenes with a sense of urgency and energy, while the ferocity of several set-pieces is amplified by such hysterics. Harry Gregson-Williams' rah-rah score also helps to strengthen the sense of intensity during crucial sequences, not to mention the dynamic Oscar-nominated sound mix makes as feel as if we're truly in the thick of the action. Thankfully, digital effects were kept to an absolute minimum too, as Scott accomplished as much as he could with practical effects and death-defying stunt-work. It allows the film to feel more real, which automatically heightens excitement and tension.

The characters of Will and Frank are thorough archetypes, but there are genuine attempts at heart (however minor) that make their roles work in spite of clichés. The dialogue is notably (and surprisingly) well-written in this respect, and the lead actors share a believable, easygoing chemistry. As Frank, Denzel Washington is highly engaging, and his charisma makes him easy to care about. Pine, on the other hand, goes through the motions well enough as Will, but he does not genuinely own the role. He lacks personality, and one gets the sense that anyone could have played the role with the same impact. Meanwhile, Rosario Dawson is extremely amiable as Connie, a yardmaster who communicates with Will and Frank over the radio. On a less positive note, though, Unstoppable introduces another glaring archetype in the form of a corporate asshole whose sole purpose is just to be an asshole. Kevin Dunn's performance as said asshole is solid, but the role is an unnecessarily addition who only serves to highlight snobbish corporate mentality in an extremely obvious fashion.

Despite its flaws, Unstoppable is an above average popcorn picture on the whole - it's not patently stupid, it has a strong enough cast, its production values are excellent, and the maddening pace allows you to overlook the lack of surprises and innovation. It's well worth checking out on a lazy afternoon.

6.9/10

Tagged as a loose remake of Howard Hawks' 1951 flick The Thing from Another World (itself an adaptation of a John W. Campbell novella), John Carpenter's The Thing is a seminal horror picture that hooks you in from the outset and never lets go. Although the production is now considered a cult classic and one of Carpenter's finest efforts, The Thing was not exactly well-received upon release back in 1982 - critics lambasted it, while other summer films like E.T., Poltergeist and Conan the Barbarian were also vying for box office dollars, thus restricting The Thing's gross revenue. Luckily, it was given new life on home video, resulting in the kind of attention it deserved in the first place. Carpenter has crafted one hell of a white-knuckle thriller here; an engrossing examination of paranoia and the repugnant nature of mankind's dark survival instinct. On top of being an impressively gory creature feature, The Thing dabbles in psychological terror, and is heavily imbued with the brand of tension that Carpenter is renowned for.

Set at an American scientific outpost in the middle of the icy Antarctic desert, the film opens as a mysterious helicopter approaches carrying a Norwegian gunman who's apparently trying to shoot a runaway husky. Believing the Norwegian to be a threat, the Americans promptly kill the gunman before learning of his motivations. Fearing that more violence is imminent, the crew travel to the Norwegian camp but find it destroyed and isolated. Also lying nearby is a mangled humanoid. Not long afterwards, the husky reveals that it's not a dog at all, but an alien organism capable of perfectly mimicking any other life-form. With the alien creature on the loose, the possibility becomes very real that one of the American crew may have been taken over, but it's unclear just who it is...

Rather than simply remaking The Thing from Another World, John Carpenter and screenwriter Bill Lancaster produced a fresh adaptation of the original novella, using the era's updated special effects to create something closer to John W. Campbell's original vision. Narratively, The Thing can probably be described as a science fiction spin on Agatha Christie's And Then There Were None (a.k.a. Ten Little Indians), as characters are being mysteriously killed but the alien murderer is able to change its identity at the drop of a hat. It's touches like this which makes the film so riveting. One could call the film derivative due to its similarities to films like Alien and Invasion of the Body Snatchers (not to mention The Thing from Another World and the aforementioned Agatha Christie story), but all horror movies are unoriginal to some extent. What matters is the technique, and The Thing is a home run in this respect. The thought that any one of the central characters can be the alien at any time becomes a source of nail-biting tension, and several set-pieces (see the blood test) are enthralling in their unpredictability.

Even though this was director John Carpenter's first feature made inside the Hollywood system, The Thing was not weakened by studio interference. There's no sappy Hollywood romance or forced happy endings here - Carpenter was allowed to stick to his hallmarks (masterful widescreen photography, extreme violence, anti-heroes), but the studio backing gave him the added benefit of a generous budget. And my word, every penny of the $15 million budget was well-spent. The creature effects are still for the most part convincing and the gore is still repellent decades on, which is a testament to both the skill of FX technician Rob Bottin and the fact that prosthetics are superior to CGI. On top of this, the atmosphere is convincing, with a combination of sets and location filming allowing us to believe that these Americans are truly trapped in the middle of nowhere. Also effective is Ennio Morricone's minimalist score, which competently builds suspense. The music was clearly inspired by Carpenter's composing style, and those unaware of Morricone's involvement may be fooled into thinking that the director was responsible for the score (as he frequently is on his movies).

Kurt Russell (who had worked with John Carpenter a year prior on Escape From New York) is top-notch as helicopter pilot R.J. MacReady; one of the most involved crewmembers in finding out who the creature is. A badass, competent character actor, Russell owns the role, and his low-key performance is utterly convincing. The Thing is very much an ensemble picture though, with strong work all-round from the likes of Keith David, Wilford Brimley, T.K. Carter, David Clennon, Richard Dysart, Charles Hallahan, Joel Polis and Donald Moffat, just to name a few. There are no weak links in this cast. Only one female is in the movie, and it's strictly a vocal role: that of a computer. It's amazing to watch a horror movie which isn't marred by some bimbo of a love interest whose sole purpose is to look beautiful and attract more viewers.

Watching The Thing in the 21st Century, it's amazing how well the film has aged. It was produced long before polished, contemporary cinema ruled by digital effects, but it remains ageless, which just proves how accomplished Carpenter and his team truly are. Its agelessness is derived from the state-of-the-art (practical) special effects, and the fact that Carpenter relies more on tension and psychological terror than outright gore. This is a B-movie through and through, but B-movies do not come much better or more proficient than this.

8.8/10

2005's low-budget, halfway-charming Hoodwinked! developed into a minor hit despite its humble origins, but does anyone out there honestly remember it? More pertinently, who genuinely wanted to see a sequel? Limping into cinemas almost six years after its predecessor, Hoodwinked Too! Hood vs. Evil is easily one of the worst animated movies ever made to date. Without any of the humble charms that made the first movie so enjoyable, Hoodwinked Too! falls completely flat on its face, with flaccid animation, no laughs and no worthwhile moments, all wrapped up in a sluggishly-paced package which will fail to satisfy even the most unfussy of movie-goers. It's for the best that this snooze-fest was an utter box office flop, failing to reach the $20 million mark worldwide even despite the 3-D surcharge.

Following the events of the first film, Red (Panettiere) has left her home to be trained in a desolate dojo in the art of baking and fighting. However, her friends at the Happily Ever After Agency are not as peachy, with Granny Puckett (Close) having been kidnapped by Verushka the Witch (Cusack) after a botched operation to rescue the kidnapped Hansel (Hader) and Gretel (Poehler). HEA head Nicky Flippers (Stiers) calls Red into the fray, sending her on a rescue mission with the Big Bad Wolf (Warburton) and his partner Twitchy (Edwards). As the trio set out to save the portly stolen kids and their beloved elderly colleague, a far more devious plan is put into effect that's bigger than any of them could have imagined.

While the original Hoodwinked! subverted the tale of Red Riding Hood by filtering it through a Rashômon lens, this lazy follow-up elects it own path, turning the potential franchise into a hyperactive action-adventure tale. Hoodwinked Too! has no shortage of fairytale elements, but they've been mashed together in a soulless stew of excess. Hoodwinked!'s original team (Todd Edwards, Cory Edwards, Tony Leech) returned to help write this sequel's script, but they clearly lost sight of what made their picture such an unexpected hit in the first place. Then again, the script is also credited to director Mike Disa, an occasional visual effects technician overseeing his first theatrical feature here. Perhaps Disa is to be blamed for the shortcomings, or perhaps the first film's masterminds were simply blinded by the promise of money. Speaking of the obvious cash grab, Hoodwinked Too! reeks of gimmick, with unnecessary stunt casting (including Cheech and Chong) and the decision to present the flick in 3-D. The camera movements, therefore, are incredibly over-caffeinated to give cinema-goers their gimmick-guided money's worth. Also awful is the animation, which looks dreary and dull (mouth movements are especially poor). Though it's somewhat of an improvement over the original film, there's no getting around the fact that this animation is completely inadequate for a theatrical presentation.

Absolutely nothing works here in terms of humour - Hoodwinked Too! relies on tired puns, unfunny in-jokes and juvenile slapstick. The first film was by no means a comedic masterpiece, but this follow-up is unable to even meet this modest standard. For God's sake, this supposed "kid's movie" even goes so far as to unsubtly reference The Silence of the Lambs, Deliverance, Scarface, Starsky and Hutch, and even Gone with the Wind. And then there are the cheap, recycled jokes, such as a cringe-worthy Star Wars reference which reeks of desperation. Speaking of unoriginality, the notion of Red being trained in a dojo but finally learning lessons in the heat of battle was borrowed from better films, while the overzealous Twitchy seems like a Scrat rip-off. With absolutely no screenwriting genius and no accomplished visuals, Hoodwinked Too! is a chore to get through. Its runtime is rather compact at 85 minutes, but the picture is such a miserable experience that it feels twice as long.

The voice work is patchy, with vocal performances ranging from decent to dismal. Both Anne Hathaway and Jim Belushi refused to reprise their roles here (as Red and the Woodsman, respectively), so, while both are missed, at least they were smart enough to pass up such dreadfully uninspired material. Unfortunately, Hathaway's replacement - Hayden Panettiere - has such a different sound and feeling that one can't help but wonder why she was chosen for the role of Red. Meanwhile, Belushi's replacement (Martin Short) is equally insipid. Aside from Bill Hader and Amy Poehler who are pretty enjoyable as Hansel and Gretel, the voice work is almost uniformly awful here; Glenn Close sounds asleep as Granny, while Patrick Warburton displays no evidence of comic timing as Wolf. And while some of the other actors seem to be trying, the material completely squanders their efforts.

Without any charm, heart or wit, Hoodwinked Too! Hood vs. Evil is an all-round bad movie suffering from bad writing and terrible execution. The novelty of fairytale characters being 21st Century spies wears off instantaneously, leaving nothing but a clichéd plot, witless dialogue and disappointing animation which was brought together by a director completely clueless about such concepts as pacing and heart. 2005's Hoodwinked! was pretty enjoyable, but this sequel reeks of money-grubbing mentality.

0.8/10

The Change-Up is an apparent attempt on the part of screenwriters Jon Lucas and Scott Moore to reinvent body-switching movies for today's audiences. While 2009's 17 Again used a similar type of concept to make a generic contemporary family flick, The Change-Up was crafted with R-rated sensibilities in mind, meaning profanity, un-PC humour and gross-out gags. In other words, The Change-Up is geared towards the Hangover crowd, which is hardly surprising since writers Lucas and Moore were also responsible for writing 2009's The Hangover. It's a shame, though, that the writers didn't shake up the formula while they were at it, as the film adheres to the same old tired template we've seen hundreds of times before. But credit where credit is due - The Change-Up is pretty damn funny if crass humour is your thing.

Married, career-minded lawyer Dave Lockwood (Bateman) is on the brink of making partner at the firm where he works. But Dave's family life is less promising, with a new set of twins driving him positively insane. To let off some steam, Dave agrees to a drunk night out with his stoner pal Mitch (Reynolds), a struggling actor who's out of work more often than not. While taking a piss in a mysterious park fountain together, Dave and Mitch simultaneously verbalise that they wish they had each other's life. Waking up the following morning, the men find that their wish has been granted: they've switched bodies. This compels the boys to search for a fast solution, but, unfortunately, the fountain is out of commission because the city plans to relocate it. Consequently, Dave and Mitch have no choice but to pose as each other until they find out the fountain's new location.

Summer 2011 also saw the release of such R-rated comedies as Bridesmaids and Horrible Bosses, the former of which benefitted from immense emotional maturity while the latter was surprisingly original. The Change-Up, on the other hand, is a different specimen (though it shares Horrible Bosses cast member Jason Bateman). The premise, as previously stated, is incredibly hackneyed, while the attempts at maturity and all of the blatant character revelations seem eye-rollingly forced and perfunctory, not to mention obvious. (Gee, do you think Dave will learn the value of marriage and realise he should be happy with what he has? And that Mitch will realise the futility of his immoral womanising lifestyle?) One imagines that a darker treatment of the same premise could have gone further and been more satisfying. After all, it is R-rated and moderately low budget, so would some boldness be too much to ask for? Additionally, in a baffling creative decision, The Change-Up's nudity is computer-generated. Indeed, you don't see the breasts of either Leslie Mann or (the scorching hot) Olivia Wilde - you just see digitally-created boobs on each actress. Now smutty comedies are denying us the authentic nudity that we crave? I miss the '80s...

While its plotting is stiff, the first half of The Change-Up is beset with hilarity - character hijinks are often uproarious, and hilarious dialogue abounds. The humour is not of the smart or witty variety, but there's a good chance you'll get at least a few satisfying belly-laughs out of the movie if you're a fan of comedies of this ilk. Director David Dobkin (Wedding Crashers) appears to have a good sense of comedic timing, resulting in a handful of perfectly-executed humorous sequences that had this reviewer in fits of laughter. Unfortunately, however, the film does slow down in its second half, and the final act is interminably long as every aspect of Mitch and Dave's epiphanies is pointlessly underlined. The Change-Up clocks in at a bewildering two hours, but comedies of this nature should be shorter and brisker.

Jason Bateman has never been looser than he is in this film. While the role of Dave is just a simple variation of Bateman's habitual screen persona, his overzealous antics and constant swearing are side-splitting when he becomes Mitch. It's also a testament to Bateman's skill as a performer that he manages to keep both roles likeable no matter what he does. Ryan Reynolds, meanwhile, is similarly terrific, showing that his dismal work in Green Lantern was just a one-off tragedy. The greatest measure of the success of stars in a body-swap comedy is how believably each actor embodies the persona of the other. Bateman and Reynolds are not perfect in this respect, but their work is nevertheless strong. Meanwhile, the remainder of the cast is pretty standard stuff; easily passable for this sort of comedy, but nothing to write home about.

The Change-Up's script leaves a bit to be desired since it unnecessarily drags out the thin premise and contains too much filler, though it's laudable that writers Jon Lucas and Scott Moore at least tried to imbue the characters with some depth. But analysis like this is probably superfluous for what's just a lightweight mainstream comedy for the masses. The fact remains that if you like R-rated romps (like The Hangover), you will probably have a good time with this movie.

6.0/10

A bit more than a year before Shark Night 3D's delayed release, 2010's gleefully enjoyable Piranha 3D swam its way into cinemas to surprising critical and commercial success. Piranha is a bad movie from a cynical perspective, but the filmmakers "got it," choosing to lather on the R-rated details (boobs, bikinis, gore, hot babes) with infectious joy and a devilish sense of humour. Unfortunately, Shark Night is not nearly as fun as its 3D fish-based predecessor. Neutered by its commercially viable PG-13 rating (though it flopped anyway), it strips away the pleasures commonly associated with B-grade monster movies, instead offering up lousy acting and bad dialogue without any R-rated compensation. Exhaustively stupid and joyless, Shark Night is a catastrophe in every conceivable way that is devastatingly short on shark thrills.

With exams coming to an end and a long weekend looming, a group of fit young students head to a secluded Louisiana vacation island home owned by the attractive Sara (Sara Paxton). Before they settle in, the group are suddenly attacked by an array of blood-thirsty sharks that have somehow made their way into the saltwater lake. Making matters worse, one of the teens loses his arm in an attack, leaving the group racing against the clock to get him back to civilisation for urgent medical assistance. As the night persists, it becomes clear that a pair of shady locals are looking to make big bucks by filming genuine shark attacks. See, as if the "young friends going to a cabin for the weekend" premise wasn't clichéd enough, Shark Night also apparently needs redneck villains. Adding human antagonists to the story is completely misguided.

Shark Night had tremendous potential to be a campy delight, especially with Snakes on a Plane and Final Destination 2director David R. Ellis at the helm. However, the docile rating, a selection of awful actors, and a genuinely terrible script spell doom for the production from the beginning. The script is credited to two individuals (Will Hayes and Jesse Studenberg), but it's baffling to consider that it took two people to write this soulless rubbish. Shark Night is monumentally stupid, with jumping sharks (and no explanation for the ability), wild tonal shifts, moronic plot developments and imbecilic characters. (After getting his arm bitten off, one character insists he must head into the water to kill the shark!) Predictably, the dialogue is dreadful, too, and the tone-deaf chatter is far too plentiful. See, the writers erroneously assume that we want to see these tired archetypes deal with their personal problems, but none of this drama is skilful enough to develop the characters beyond the clichéd shark bait that they truly are. Thus, instead of frequent shark carnage, we mostly get naff drama and tedious character interaction that is only made worse by inept actors, rendering Shark Night, for the most part, intolerable. Interestingly, Avatar star Joel David Moore is in the cast, meaning he has officially betrayed James Cameron by starring in precisely the type of 3D horror movie that the Avatar director abhors...

In the lead-up to its release, Shark Night's optimistic supporters claimed that a PG-13 rating was okay because Steven Spielberg's Jaws is PG. But nobody behind Shark Night can hold a candle to Spielberg in terms of tension and suspense - the film fails as a serious horror movie. To ensure the PG-13 rating, the picture is full of careless shark cam and jarringly abrupt editing, leaving the kill sequences unclear and unsatisfying. There is more blood here than expected, but blood tends to suddenly and awkwardly disappear. For instance, during the climax, a shark is blown apart in CGI fashion, after which the water is clear, and no gory particles are visible. It's not that extra gore, tits, and profanity would automatically make the film better, but there's nothing worse than seeing R-rated material uneasily (and unsatisfyingly) being cut down for the sake of extra box office. Ellis is not in sync with the material, evidently striving to make a "serious" thriller (and failing) while the premise screamed for him to lighten up and provide a fun ride. The movie is too goofy to be a serious horror movie, and it is not ridiculous enough to succeed as a guilty pleasure. It is stuck in a strange middle ground.

Ellis occasionally plays into the 3D gimmick, but the movie fails to take full advantage of the potential for a 3D shark attack movie. Furthermore, to make matters worse, the shark effects are dreadful. Deep Blue Sea was released 14 years before Shark Night, yet the inconsistent shark effects in Renny Harlin's fun-as-hell shark movie remain far more convincing than anything glimpsed in this cinematic turd. The animatronic sharks are barely seen in Shark Night, while their computer-generated counterparts look embarrassingly phoney. The movie does its highlights, particularly an amusing and preposterous scene depicting a jumping shark devouring someone on a jet ski, but these moments can be watched on YouTube without suffering through the rest of the tedious picture. Indeed, the lulls between the shark attacks grow increasingly intolerable with each passing minute.

Shark Night even commences by blatantly ripping off Spielberg's Jaws. The opening sequence features an attractive beach babe doing her best Susan Backlinie impression while director Ellis tries his hardest to emulate the decades-old classic's intense opener. There is even a boat skiing attack scene that's eerily similar to a set piece from Jaws 2. But if Spielberg's handling of Jaws was as inept as Ellis's efforts here, then Spielberg would not have developed into the iconic filmmaker he is now. There's no reason to waste your time on this vile picture. If you must watch it, though, stay through the credits for an admittedly hilarious music video. It's the only thing worth seeing in the entire production.

2.1/10

Popularised by 1999's The Blair Witch Project, the "found footage" subgenre has to date covered a wide array of areas, including exorcisms, ghosts, monsters, zombies, and more. Apollo 18 blasts the subgenre into outer space, mixing thrills, claustrophobia, conspiracy theories and altered history to generate this rather unique attempt at manufactured realism. The movie is also note-worthy due to how aggressive the "authenticity" claims are; producer Bob Weinstein was quoted as saying "We didn't shoot anything, we found it. Found, baby", and Apollo 18's marketing asserts that it presents "the truth" about why NASA abruptly stopped travelling to the moon. Conspiracy freaks are likely to have a fucking field day with the faux facts presented here, but the film is destined to be polarising for average movie-goers - it may satisfy admirers of found footage pictures, but it probably won't impress many others.

It's a well-noted historical fact that NASA cancelled all moon-bound space missions after Apollo 17, and this has fuelled conspiracy theories for years. Apollo 18 posits the possibility that this may have been part of a huge government cover-up. Claiming to have been edited from 84 hours of raw footage long hidden from the public, the film concerns the secret launch of Apollo 18, which was manned by a trio of astronauts: Ben Anderson (Christie), Nate Walker (Owen), and John Grey (Robbins). With John stationed in orbit, Ben and Nate begin studying the moon's surface and collecting rock samples. However, the pair soon discover that there may be more to the mission than originally thought. After finding an abandoned Russian proton lander and a blooded corpse nearby, Ben and Nate realise that something strange is happening, and that the moon may not be as desolate as initially assumed.

With movie-goers now quite knowledgeable about the found footage gimmick after having been duped by The Blair Witch Project, it's impossible to craft another such flick that will actually fool anyone. Therefore, the success of any found footage film is measured by how believably the material is sold. Thankfully, director Gonzalo López-Gallego for the most part gets it right in this respect. The performances here seem remarkably natural, the sets are completely convincing, and the visual scheme competently sells the gimmick. Apollo 18 looks like it was genuinely shot in space back in the 1970s, with a grainy, dated-looking film aesthetic that's free of Hollywood artifice. Better still, the various visual imperfections work extremely well, with scratches, specks of dirt and camera glitches that feel completely organic and further help to sell the illusion. Patrick Lussier's editing, meanwhile, is equally impressive, with multiple-camera set-ups having been cut to ensure maximum coherency. The final touch is the evocative sound mix which further allows us to believe we're watching genuine footage rather than actors on a set.

Like every found footage movie, Apollo 18 is a slow-burn of a thriller, so one's enjoyment of the picture is very dependant on your liking of the gimmick. If you found Paranormal Activity boring, you're destined to lose patience rapidly, but this reviewer found the material to be intensely watchable (even engrossing) as it subtly raises anxiety and tension levels the more the narrative progresses. It also seems that writers Cory Goodman and Brian Miller conducted a lot of research, as the dialogue is full of credible-sounding technical mumbo-jumbo. But Apollo 18 does stumble in its scripting department, as Ben, Nate and John are given merely a job title and a few family references before being thrown into horrific circumstances. The film does not provide much of a chance for us to truly care about these characters, hence the picture's dramatic stronghold is not as powerful as it should have been. And, of course, it takes until the movie's final act before any sort of powerful extraterrestrial threat kicks in, but the payoff is underwhelming. It feels like the filmmakers could have gone further and designed a more terrifying space-based horror film.

At the end of the day, Apollo 18 is a competent enough effort, with top-notch technical contributions and a cast capable of naturalistic acting. However, it fails to leave a lasting impact due to the forgettable, generic characters and the lingering sense that more could have been done with this bone-chilling premise.

6.1/10

The Poughkeepsie Tapes is a faux documentary which recounts the story of a serial killer based in Poughkeepsie, New York who terrorised the local community for over ten years. A killer who constantly changed his modus operandi, he managed to continuously elude police as they were unable to recognise that all of his murders were the work of the same man. Eventually, the killer - dubbed 'The Water Street Butcher' - slipped up, and SWAT teams found his abandoned residence, along with a huge library of ancient VHS tapes containing footage of him torturing and murdering his victims. Extended interviews with FBI agents, police officers, as well as friends and family of the victims is shown throughout, interweaved with clips from the killer's video library that shows us exactly what this disturbed individual did with his victims.

The first problem with The Poughkeepsie Tapes rears its head in the very first scene. We're meant to believe that this is a professionally-edited documentary, but the film opens with an outtake of someone asking "Are you filming?". This type of stuff may be suitable in films like [Rec] which are meant to be unedited, but it's forced and out-of-place here. Another key issue is that the film's minuscule budget is too often obvious. Sure, the tapes are meant to look as if they were filmed with poor quality consumer camcorders, but gore is often awkwardly eschewed, which just gives the impression of lazy filmmaking. The interviews lead us to believe these tapes are disturbing, but they're for the most part incomprehensible. And what can be seen of the torturing and killing is badly acted and badly directed - a typical CSI episode is more shocking. Worse, the effects laid over the VHS footage to make it look dated seems incredibly forced. The effect just doesn't work - you're meant to believe what you're watching and find it chilling... But the tapes never seem real, are ugly to watch, and are not imbued with any degree of tension.

Director John Erick Dowdle (who wrote the script with his brother) also falters in the talking-head interviews, a lot of which feel incredibly phoney. One of the main issues is that the lines seem very scripted, which drains believability from the picture. Even worse is the archive footage of press conferences, news reports and court proceedings which are stiff and flat - you cannot suspend your disbelief for over a second. The acting, too, is primarily off the mark, and the performances lack credibility. The Poughkeepsie Tapes is, in a nutshell, a muddled mess from top to bottom that's unable to conjure up any worthwhile moments of intensity or horror, which is the worst sin any horror movie can commit.

To the credit of the picture, however, it has a few bright spots. Ron Harper is the only interviewee with any degree of charm and believability (perhaps due to his veteran acting status), and his segments seem somewhat real. Keefus Ciancia's accompanying score is also competent enough to make for at least a few engaging moments. But at the end of the day, The Poughkeepsie Tapes is a missed opportunity; a frequently drab horror movie that's unable to fulfil basic genre requirements. As of 2011, the movie is only available on DVD exclusively through Blockbuster, and copies are not readily available. This is for the best.

3.7/10

Quality cinematic spoofing and satire is an increasingly rare commodity, with moronic films like Disaster Movie and Meet the Spartans insulting and degrading a formerly cherished art form. Thank goodness, then, for films like 1999's Galaxy Quest that remind us how satisfying a genuinely well-written spoof can be. Scripted by Robert Gordon and first-timer David Howard, Galaxy Quest is simultaneously a parody and an affectionate tribute to popular science-fiction franchises, most notably the Star Trek universe and its real-world fans. With pitch-perfect casting, razor-sharp writing, spot-on characters and assured filmmaking in every respect, the resulting film is a hilarious blast of sci-fi fun. It's a perfect lazy afternoon movie.

The story explores a simple "what if" premise: what if a race of otherworldly aliens mistook episodes of a fictional sci-fi series for authentic historical documents and built their civilisation around the show? Furthermore, what if the aliens truly believed that the show's cast were actual space explorers and travelled to Earth seeking their help? In the context of this film, Galaxy Quest is a long-cancelled cult television show whose washed-up stars are now middle-aged with no career prospects beyond appearances at fan conventions. The only actor who genuinely enjoys the attention is William Shatner-esque Jason Nesmith (Tim Allen), who played the high-ranking Commander Taggert on the show. Meanwhile, fellow cast members Gwen (Sigourney Weaver), Fred (Tony Shalhoub), Alexander (Alan Rickman) and Tommy (Daryl Mitchell) resent Jason and the dire state of their careers. Following a particularly heated convention, a group of desperate aliens known as the Thermians approach Nesmith, pleading for his assistance to defeat the genocidal Sarris (Robin Sachs). Before long, Nesmith and his fellow cast members, accompanied by convention handler and one-time cast member Guy (Sam Rockwell), are sucked into a genuine space adventure, not unlike something from their former TV program.

Opening with a segment from the fictitious Galaxy Quest show that features knowingly goofy hairstyles, corny dialogue, retro sets and a general air of silliness, it is immediately apparent that the movie's satirical sights are set on Gene Roddenberry's Star Trek universe, as it gleefully sends up the various clichés and tendencies of the old TV show. Additionally, the screenplay playfully pokes fun at washed-up TV stars without malice or cruelty. In the story, the Galaxy Quest cast cannot find any worthwhile paying gigs apart from signing autographs, which happened to a few of the original Star Trek cast members, and aspects of Nesmith's character are even based on William Shatner. But what's so special about the film is that it ridicules the protagonists while also creating relatable, sympathetic characters that are easy to care about. As the narrative progresses, the ostensibly shallow characters develop into interesting, three-dimensional people, which most surface-level parodies fail to do. Another enjoyable quirk of Galaxy Quest is that the show's fans are known as "Questians," which is an obvious nod to "Trekkies."

Galaxy Quest is a "have-your-cake-and-eat-it-too movie", as it parodies a genre while also representing a strong addition to said genre - think Scream, Hot Fuzz and Shaun of the Dead. Therefore, on top of being a hilarious spoof, Galaxy Quest is also an incredibly entertaining sci-fi action-adventure with first-rate special effects, exciting battles, and even remarkably unforced moments of pathos. In other words, it is a proper story with real stakes. Director Dean Parisot admirably acquits himself with the material, showing a superb grasp of comedic timing while also handling the action sequences and the dramatic moments with the confidence of a seasoned veteran. The pacing is exceptionally strong throughout the 100-minute running time, and even when the laughs are not as frequent, the film always remains fun. Additionally, technical contributions are practically flawless across the board, with vibrant, eye-catching cinematography by Jerzy Zieliński, while David Newman's wonderfully cheesy and flavoursome original score perfectly replicates the tone and feel of old Star Trek music. With a generous but not overwhelming $45 million budget, the special effects by Industrial Light and Magic are fantastic, with the picture incorporating excellent miniature work and convincing computer-generated imagery, while Stan Winston's prosthetics and makeup artistry make this sci-fi universe seem entirely real. The writing, however, is the film's key strength - the hilariously quotable dialogue is endless, and the movie features some of the wittiest group banter ever seen in an ensemble movie.

The impeccable cast is another highlight, with not a single weak spot in the ensemble. The actors fully commit to their roles, playing the characters straight and never seeming in on the joke. Tim Allen is extremely funny here, while the always-reliable Alan Rickman steals the show with a hilarious performance as an embittered actor who outright resents the Galaxy Quest show and believes he has squandered his acting potential. Rickman excels at dry humour, and the script serves him well here, with several side-splitting one-liners. Sigourney Weaver is equally strong, playing the show's thankless sex symbol with pitch-perfect comedic conviction. Meanwhile, Tony Shalhoub delivers an uproariously deadpan performance as the trademark techie, and Enrico Colantoni is funny and likeable as the Thermian leader, Mathesar. Then there's the brilliant Sam Rockwell, who constantly steals the spotlight playing a one-time Galaxy Quest extra who epitomises the traits of a "Red Shirt" crewmember from the original Star Trek series and is in constant fear of death. Also keep a look out for Justin Long, who makes his film debut here as a teen fanboy/geek who is so wrapped up in the old series that he cannot distinguish between reality and fiction.

A rare action adventure with style and substance, Galaxy Quest gets everything right. It's a testament to the team behind Galaxy Quest that being a sworn-in follower of geekdom is not required to appreciate and have fun with the film. The humour cleverly blends surface-level goofiness with sly satirical jabs at the Star Trek universe, engendering its own unique identity and universe. With this in mind, it is frankly astonishing that the film has not developed a massive cult following. Sure, it has its fans and was the subject of a Fandom documentary, but it remains incredibly underrated and under-appreciated. It's consistently laugh-out-loud funny, and the fact that it is a PG-rated film fit for family consumption makes it even more commendable.

9.0/10

If Friends with Benefits sounds somewhat familiar, that's because it's pretty much the exact same movie as 2011's No Strings Attached. Both are R-rated studio comedies with a pair of bankable lead performers, and both are rom-coms concerning the concept of "fuck buddy" relationships. But Friends with Benefits is the superior movie; it's brighter, funnier and more likeable than the earlier picture, and it stars two appealing lead actors who actually feel like best friends. Effervescently directed by Will Gluck, this is a surprisingly decent romantic comedy which is both entertaining and funny. Girls will enjoy the central romance of the picture, while guys will enjoy the presence of Mila Kunis and all of the sexual humour. In other words, it's a rare type of date movie that's not agonising for either gender.

Emotionally damaged following a harsh break-up, Los Angeles-native magazine art director Dylan (Timberlake) accepts a new position for a job in New York City. Faced with no friends in a strange city, Dylan begins spending time with Jamie (Kunis), the chirpy corporate head-hunter who recruited him. Also coming off a bad break-up, Jamie clicks wonderfully with Dylan, and they become fast friends. On a whim, the two soon begin a purely sexual relationship. Of course, the meaningless bedroom fun works for the pair until emotions and feelings start to enter the equation.

One of the greatest successes of Friends with Benefits is the dialogue. Rather than typical vanilla rom-com dialogue, the script is full of witty banter. In particular, the repartee between Dylan and Jamie is well-written, often funny, and engaging. Also refreshing about the film is the way that the characters mock typical rom-com clichés - at one stage, Dylan and Jamie view a fictional romantic comedy (starring Jason Segal and Rashida Jones) that's filled with every last trite genre staple, and the characters openly dissect the predictable nature of rom-coms while watching it. Of course, though, Friends with Benefits is guilty of succumbing to rom-com clichés in both its filmmaking (montages and upbeat pop songs) and structure (in fact the broad strokes are identical to No Strings Attached). While boldness is pretty much forbidden in studio-produced romantic comedies like this, it's nevertheless a shame that the writers didn't shake up the formula or attempt to do something audacious. A bit of daring writing would have been especially refreshing since the uncannily similar No Strings Attached was released just a few months prior.

Admittedly, romantic comedies are always clichéd to some degree, so what matters is the execution. In this respect, Friends with Benefits scores a passing grade. Armed with a directorial zing that one wouldn't expect from the director of 2009's woeful Fired Up, the film is for the most part fast-paced and disarmingly enjoyable, with a soundtrack of catchy songs developing a playful tone. However, some of the editing is a bit choppy and jarring, and the bubbly pacing does momentarily erode once the film hits its second half and the proverbial serious moments begin to kick in. In particular, there are scenes involving Dylan's Alzheimer's-suffering father (Jenkins) that feel awkward in such a light-hearted mainstream romantic comedy. Not to mention, the characters face these types of dramas while a conventional break-up-to-make-up scenario lies in the story's peripheries. This stuff is present to build a sense of maturity, sure, but they aren't handled with enough skill for them to emerge as anything but minor distractions that were thrown in because the formula demanded it.

Mila Kunis and Justin Timberlake are a terrific on-screen couple, with their immense chemistry allowing you to genuinely believe that they're best friends. However, Timberlake's performance is not as strong as Kunis', and his limitations as an actor do arise from time to time (which is odd considering Timberlake's terrific efforts in The Social Network). Kunis, on the other hand, truly shines with a vivacious performance. Fortunately, the supporting cast is extraordinarily good. Woody Harrelson (Zombieland) is an utter scene-stealer as Tommy, and he scores several good laughs. Unfailing character actor Richard Jenkins (Dear John) is also terrific as Dylan's father, while Jenna Elfman and Nolan Gould are both likeably down-to-earth as Dylan's sister and nephew (respectively). Meanwhile, recognisable comedic performers Emma Stone (Easy A) and Andy Samberg (I Love You, Man) show up in mere cameo roles at the beginning, playing the exes of Dylan and Jamie (respectively).

Likable as hell and benefitting from a handful of really funny moments, Friends with Benefits is for the most part a romantic comedy done right. If you can overlook the predictable nature and a few draggy moments, there's a great deal of entertainment to be unearthed here. And make sure you stay until the end of the credits for one last satirical jab at rom-coms.

7.0/10

The opening moments of Rubber break the fourth wall, with a character randomly climbing out of a car boot to explain the principal of "no reason" which governs movies and real life. The principal essentially states that there are things we do not question because they have no real reason behind them. ("In the Steven Spielberg movie E.T., why is the alien brown? No reason.") Writer-director Quentin Dupieux invoked this "no reason" policy for every single aspect of Rubber's narrative, thus allowing himself the freedom to craft a dark comedy that's completely absurd. How is a tire alive? No reason. Why does a tire have psychokinetic powers? No reason. Why are there spectators watching the "movie" about the tire? No reason. It's a brilliantly innovative style of meta filmmaking which additionally explores the relationship between movie-goers and Hollywood, and functions as a hilariously biting satire of the movie-going climate of today.

The story takes place somewhere in the desert, where a ragtag group of spectators with binoculars are metaphorically positioned as the crowd of theatre-goers watching a "movie". In said movie, a tire named Robert comes to life, rising up from the sands armed with psychokinetic powers to explore the world. As he wanders around the immediate area, Robert uses his powers to kill people by making their heads spontaneously explode. The crowd of spectators, meanwhile, are thinned out, but one of them (Hauser) refuses to stop watching the movie because he wants to know how it will end. His stubbornness compels a police lieutenant (Spinella) to persist in his pursuit of the lethal fugitive tire, though he wants to just go home.

The sneaky marketing implied that Rubber was nothing but a rehash of slasher conventions with a tire instead of a masked killer, but this is another classic case of significant mis-marketing. CHUD's review describes the film as "Roger Corman by way of Samuel Beckett", and that's pretty much an ideal summary of this quirky, postmodern oddity. In amidst the logic-devoid story about the strangest cinematic serial killer in history, Dupieux finds time for satire. With the fictional audience comprised of all the usual cinema-goer stereotypes, Dupieux essentially presents a cultural cross-section of today's movie-going public. It satirises cinema-goer attitudes as well - the geeks break out into discussions at various times, and a bratty kid complains that the "film" is already boring barely a few minutes into the show. A cynical spectator even approaches the actors at one stage to criticise the stupidity of a certain scene. The most brilliant instance of satire, though, involves the audience gobbling up a turkey that's thrown in front them, as the "organisers" know that they'll lap it up regardless of quality. Astute viewers will understand this sly metaphor, which is furthered in subsequent scenes to side-splitting degree. The layers of satire go deeper than this, but suffice it to say this material is best experienced than spoiled.

On top of writing and directing, Quentin Dupieux carried out several additional duties on the film; he was the cinematographer, camera operator, co-editor and co-scorer. It's fair to say that this was his baby, so he gets tremendous credit for making it work as well as it does. He set himself a huge technical challenge by making a tire the central character, but Dupieux rose to the challenge. The visual effects which brought the tire to life are stunningly seamless; guaranteed to provoke murmurs of "How did they do that?". This technical excellence thankfully extends to the gore, which is satisfyingly brutal and for the most part looks like it was pulled off with practical effects. Also worth mentioning are the actors, all of whom understood the type of movie Dupieux was aiming for and delivered appropriate performances. Stephen Spinella stands out the most, which is relieving since most of the humour and the satirical elements are conveyed through his character of Lieutenant Chad. Wings Hauser gets a massive kudos as well for his amusing portrayal of a wheelchair-bound audience member.

It's been a long time since a filmmaker has made such a weird movie for the sake of being weird in a cinematic climate packed with so much mainstream Hollywood fluff. Even though Rubber falters towards the end as it struggles to find a coherent plot and devise the best way to close the door, it's difficult not to like such an original movie.

8.0/10