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Posted : 22 hours, 49 minutes ago on 24 November 2009 05:36
(A review of Trailer Park Boys: The Movie)
"Do you want to take it to Fucktown Lahey? Cause that's where this is headed: Downtown Fucktown!"
The enormous popularity and strong cult following of the brilliant Canadian vérité-style TV show Trailer Park Boys ensured a feature-length motion picture would eventually materialise - and it has arrived in the form of the gleefully crass and unapologetically non-PC Trailer Park Boys: The Movie. While this film doesn't necessary jive with some of the continuity established in the long-running television show, it's easily forgivable since the humour is in the same vein and the characters are still their usual selves.
For those who require a little context, Trailer Park Boys chronicles the get rich quick schemes of Ricky (Wells), Julian (Tremblay) and Bubbles (Smith); three inhabitants of the Sunnyvale Trailer Park in Nova Scotia. Ricky is the loser of the group who lives in his car, drinks liquor out of cat dishes and is a small-time pot farmer. Julian is the smart one who is unable to succeed due to Ricky's sheer idiocy. The strange bespectacled Bubbles cares for stray kittens and makes money by stealing shopping carts, fixing them, and selling them back to the mall. The trio are also accompanied by their sidekicks Cory (Bowles) and Trevor (Jackson), who aim to please Ricky no matter how much trouble he gives them. The trailer park is watched over in Gestapo-like fashion by alcoholic former police officer Jim Lahey (Dunsworth) and his perpetually shirtless, hamburger-eating, former male prostitute right hand man Randy (Roach). A few new faces are introduced in the film too, such as Hugh Dillon as the owner of a local gentlemen's club, and Nichole Hiltz playing a dancer who has eyes for Julian.
The movie opens when Ricky and Julian are at the tail end of a gaol sentence. They're let out early because Ricky is skilled at hockey, and the guards believe that getting rid of him will help their chances in the hockey tournament. Back in Sunnyvale Trailer Park, the boys (now reunited with Bubbles and the rest of their companions) begin to plot a way to earn a living. They begin contemplating what comes to be known as "the big dirty"; a heist that will allow the boys to retire from their life of crime forever. When it occurs to Julian that coins are untraceable and aren't as prosecutable as notes, the gang attempt to rob a few parking meters, which ultimately leads to the theft of a giant change container at a local cinema. Meanwhile, the everlastingly drunk Mr. Lahey tries to get the trio evicted.
Prison, car homes, theft, perpetual drinking, weed, skanks and shambolic cat accommodation decorate this fly-on-the-wall tale of these trailer park lowlifes. As absurd and off-putting as it is to follow the lives of proud hobos, the clandestine wit combined with a certain base humour will quickly ensnare tentative viewers. From the get-go, the protagonists say and do undeniably stupid things, but manage to come up with brilliant scams to get themselves out of trouble. While jokes and situations from the original show are recycled here, it all fits. After all, each episode of the TV show concerned the boy's latest scheme or latest dilemma - this just follows that tradition. Like all TV-show-to-movie conversions, this just feels like an extended episode. But considering the unhinged fun on offer, who really gives a shite?
The Trailer Park Boys big screen debut is a success no matter how you look at it. The gags are very funny, and contain the right mix of sweetness, natural warmth and crassness. The television series always maintained a sense of humanity and heart (otherwise the show would just seem like a showcase of unpleasant characters who trade verbal jabs for the hell of it), and this is thankfully retained for Trailer Park Boys: The Movie. Better, the characters are never degraded or glorified. Meanwhile the excessive profanity in addition to the drug and alcohol-laced humour works extraordinary well because the characters are all developed nicely, and this type of comedy suits their personalities. The laughs never feel forced; instead, they all seem to be a natural extension of the film's key players. Ricky, for instance, never finished school, drinks excessively and gets stoned frequently, and therefore the way he mucks up words and swears a lot feels appropriate. The only noticeable flaw is that the film drags from the 60-minute mark until about the 80-minute mark. In all likelihood, this is a side effect of being accustomed to viewing the show in 30-minute episodes, or it could be a side effect of laughing so damn hard for the first hour.
Like the TV show, a mockumentary style has been employed, meaning there are to-camera asides and extensive use of handheld camera. The movie was lensed on gritty 16mm film, which lends itself well to the documentary aesthetic. Trailer Park Boys: The Movie is not a visually impressive film at all, but it doesn't need to be or aspire to be - it's more concerned with pace and comedic timing. Stylistically, the only deviation from the television show is the fact that the testimonials have been cut down considerably, and the camera crew are not actual characters. Interestingly, while fans of the TV series will appreciate this movie much movie, it's still an enjoyable watch for the uninitiated (though they'd probably find the movie funnier the second time around).
The entire cast is wonderfully committed and appear to be having one hell of a fun time. As Ricky, Rob Wells has an overripe Elvis handsomeness (with a gut to match) as well as a hysterical single-mindedness in his determination to do two things: get back to gaol to win an important hockey tournament, and return to his former life of domestic bliss when he grew & sold weed. John Paul Tremblay plays Julian with a terrific deadpan comic persona, and is NEVER seen without a glass of rum & coke. Meanwhile Mike Smith's performance as Bubbles is endearing and downright hilarious. His semi-autistic shtick fits the character perfectly. Lucy Decoutere is winning as Ricky's ecdysiastically enthusiastic love interest, as is Lydia Lawson-Baird as Ricky's pre-teen daughter Trinity. It would take all day to list the rest of the brilliant cast members, so it'd be easier to sum them all up - they all embody their characters perfectly, and carry out their duties superbly.
Trailer Park Boys: The Movie has received largely dismissive reviewers, but as far as caper films go, this one is perfectly serviceable and highly enjoyable. It's unpretentious and eager to please.
7.7/10
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Posted : 2 days ago on 23 November 2009 04:05
(A review of The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus)
"Can you put a price on your dreams?"
To begin this review on a clichéd but nonetheless justified note, The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus (the latest motion picture of Terry Gilliam - best known as a piece of the Monty Python puzzle) has been saddled with an unreasonable burden. The fact that this movie features the final acting performance of the late Heath Ledger (who passed away during filming) will likely throw audiences and critics off the scent. Audiences viewing this movie on account of Ledger (or Johnny Depp, who is given a brief cameo appearance) will walk away disappointed - The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus is not a Heath Ledger film; it's a Terry Gilliam picture, meaning that it's a true oddity of a movie as opposed to a mainstream fantasy fare. Gilliam is a filmmaker recognised for creating peculiar cinematic flights of fancy with strange scenarios and trippy dream-like sequences (he was behind Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, Brazil, 12 Monkeys, etc), so for The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus the filmmaker has cooked up an elaborate, fantastical tale of travelling theatre performances, the afflictions of mortality, and a portal (flimsily disguised as a mirror) that ushers you into a world of your dreams.
The titular Dr. Parnassus (Plummer) is a centuries-old showman who travels around contemporary London in a rickety horse-drawn carriage with a troupe of performers resembling a medieval pantomime. Their performance centres on a magic mirror, through which audiences can enter a surreal world that projects their innermost desires. From there, they are faced with a choice: succumb to their baser, more cowardly wishes, or opt to follow their more noble side. But little do Parnassus' actors know that he made a deal with the devil: in exchange for eternal life, Parnassus agrees to give the devil (played by Waits) his first child on her 16th birthday. And that birthday is fast approaching...
Terry Gilliam, it would seem, is a cursed filmmaker - he has suffered some horrendously bad luck during most of his projects. Brazil was recut by Universal, The Man Who Killed Don Quixote was shut down completely after being beset with problems, and The Adventures of Baron Munchausen was dumped by Columbia. When Ledger died in January 2008, it was all too familiar. Gilliam's response to the tragedy was admirable - since the film is split into two worlds, fantasy and reality, and the footage featuring Ledger constituted the "real world" sequences, Gilliam was able to retool the script and hire three additional actors to play Tony (Ledger's character) in the fantasy sections: Johnny Depp, Jude Law and Colin Farrell (all of whom donated their pay to Ledger's daughter). The explanation behind the different appearances of Tony is that in the imaginary world, he becomes a projection of his own, and other people's desires. It's a seamless solution to a terrible setback, and the film as a whole comes across as remarkably cohesive.
A speech delivered by Johnny Depp at one stage appears to pay direct tribute to Ledger - Depp stands beside a river as miniature boats float by which display images of celebrities who died young (like James Dean and Rudolph Valentino). He eulogises them as never growing old or ugly, and explains that they'll survive as "gods" in the mind of the public.
Unlike Ledger's scene-stealing turn in The Dark Knight, his character in The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus is more low-key, though he's still captivating and full of energy. However Gilliam's film is not exactly the most fitting end to Ledger's career - it's not that he isn't good, but that this is an ensemble piece and he's no more interesting than anyone else around him (he only receives top billing out of sheer courtesy). In fact, there's no sign of Ledger for half an hour until the inescapably morbid sequence when he's found hanging under a bridge. Johnny Depp, Jude Law and Colin Farrell submit perfectly adequate work as the alternative appearances of Tony. To their credit, they all manage to embody the character and it's easy to accept the adjustment (especially if one remembers that in dreams, people often look like somebody else).
The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus was scripted by Gilliam and Charles McKeown (who worked together previously for Brazil and The Adventures of Baron Munchausen). In many ways, this is a typical Gilliam film - from the style (the use of hallucinatory imagery) to the very Gilliam-esque theme that there's redemption to be found in imagination and dreaming. For this venture, the writer-director is given the limitless capabilities of CGI. Gilliam has produced sumptuous imagery using more old-school effects, and therefore the finest computer-generated moments of this movie are utterly dazzling. The melding together of modern London urbanscapes with the ancient production design of the Parnassus carriage and the CGI wonderlands beyond the mirror is a spectacle of the highest regard.
The fantasyland bursts with pure strangeness; allowing Gilliam the freedom to be his usual self. In fact, there are numerous sequences which feel like old Monty Python animations that have been enhanced with contemporary CGI. Unfortunately, though, for all the extravagant imagery, the film lacks characters to genuinely care about or relate to. A key problem also emerges during the middle section when the emotional core fades and nothing close to a satisfying or workable story emerges. Gilliam may have an eye for enthralling imagery, but he also has a tin ear for dialogue - the characters spout some pretty dull lines from time to time. While some have criticised the story as messy, one simply needs to pay attention - it's a perfectly straightforward narrative presented in an admirably unconventional and unpredictable fashion, and it asks an audience to draw their own conclusions. There's no problem with a movie that asks an audience to engage their brain.
Terry Gilliam remains a fascinating moviemaker with the ability to amaze. Happily, The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus is a spellbinding dosage of classic Gilliam. To lose a leading actor partway through production and have the creative intelligence required to retool the narrative in a way that still makes sense is a testament to Gilliam's artistic tenacity that makes his work so interesting.
7.9/10
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Posted : 2 days, 18 hours ago on 22 November 2009 10:00
(A review of The Wild Geese)
"Good luck to you, you Godless murderers. "
Based on the novel by Daniel Carney, The Wild Geese is a classic British action-adventure movie which follows the tried-and-true formula successfully mined in such films as The Dirty Dozen and The Guns of Navarone. It's a remarkable combination of male bonding, military stereotypes, detailed briefings, last-minute snafus, double-crosses and (above all) epic, violent shootouts. Yet this venture is also inherently British, and it's all the better for it.
The plotline is your usual men-on-a-mission tale with a few extra twists. High-powered banker Edward Matherson (Granger) hires a faded mercenary named Allan Faulkner (Burton) to assemble a band of mercenaries to execute an assignment in Africa. Their mission is to rescue imprisoned former African leader Julius Limbani (Ntshona) who's critically ill and due for execution. After the recruits endure a bout of boot camp training, they're dropped into the bush. The mercs are able to pull off their mission without a hitch at first, but then things get ugly...
While the brilliance of The Wild Geese is partly attributable to the high action quotient, the strong characterisations are perhaps the film's most enduring element. In the same vein as The Dirty Dozen, the film takes its time with the characters - prior to the action, an enjoyable collection of scenes are provided which depict the soldiers on their home turf as the determinedly over-the-top Faulkner assembles his team. Reginald Rose's screenplay cleverly varies the motivations of the mercenaries; some are in it to support their high living, while others are aging soldiers seeking one final great adventure. Some believe in the cause, while others simply need the cash to pay rent. This character development capably elicits sympathy for what would otherwise be a pretty unscrupulous bunch of mercenaries. The pace rapidly picks up once the squad are shipped to Africa for training. Tension builds inexorably as the fastidiously laid out plans begin to work far too smoothly. From there, the film alternates between daft but engaging action sequences, and scenes of heavy exposition. Smartly, the script doesn't ignore or condone the inherent moral contradictions of mercenary life. The characters are given the chance to discuss, criticise and defend their chosen profession (and, in one case, racism).
The direction by Andrew V. McLaglen is brilliantly taut; the film only occasionally bogs during the 130-minute runtime. Once The Wild Geese shifts into its third act, the action sequences are frequent and fantastic. Despite the fact that this actioner was made in the 1970s, it manages to rival action set-pieces in contemporary military pictures. Certainly, the gore factor isn't astronomical (à la Saving Private Ryan) but a lot of blood is spilt and the body count is phenomenal. With the assistance of John Glen, McLaglen has created skilful set-pieces; from the tense covert infiltration to the full scale battles. This builds up to the excellent climactic action scene that transcends the conventions of the genre with its gritty nature and the lack of mercy shown towards the film's most amiable characters. All of this is accompanied by the appropriately militaristic themes conjured up by the film's composer Roy Budd. The score suits the movie perfectly during the exciting gunfights, as well as the more emotional moments when subtler cues are employed.
Several of Roger Moore's colleagues (from the James Bond films he starred in) also worked on The Wild Geese: Maurice Binder designed the title sequence, Bob Simmons had a hand in the stunts, Syd Cain took care of production design, and the aforementioned John Glen was both editor and second unit director. The cinematic techniques can be perceived as dated, but at the time they were fairly cutting-edge, and this should be respected. Besides, the filmmaking is not dated to the point that it's distracting. Alas, there are a few problems with this movie - some sloppy dialogue, an overlong runtime, a few contrived endangerment scenarios, and a sense of predictability & unoriginality that can't be eluded throughout the second half.
Another great joy of The Wild Geese is witnessing so many fine British & Irish stars and character actors gathered together in one film. Three acting giants of British cinema took the lead roles here. Heading the list is Richard Burton as the cynical Colonel Faulkner. Expectedly, Burton is superb; dominating the screen at all times and attacking dialogue with great gusto. Richard Harris as Rafar Janders is equally exceptional; he's a remarkable counterpoint to the apparent immorality of Burton's Faulkner, and he's the emotional core of the film. Completing the trio is none other than Sir Roger Moore as Shawn Flynn. Back in 1978, Moore was in the midst of his seven-film run as James Bond, but the actor wisely brings Flynn to life with a much harder edge (as evident with the character's introduction - Flynn forces a drug kingpin to eat heroin laced with strychnine at gunpoint). German actor Hardy Krüger is another fitting addition to the Wild Geese roster in the pivotal role of South African Lt. Pieter Coetze. He submits a remarkable performance.
Interestingly, there's a key indicator of this being a '70s film - the almost complete lack of woman; something which probably would not be allowed by head office in the 21st Century. The top-billed actress of this movie is Rosalind Lloyd (producer Euan Lloyd's daughter) in a two-scene role as a croupier in love with Shawn Flynn.
The Wild Geese is a classic slice of '70s action-adventure, with a cast of UK movie legends, some memorable dialogue and a plethora of spectacular action set-pieces. When you're in the mood for a high-calibre, top-notch Brit action film, you can't do better than this. As the saying goes; "They don't make 'em like this anymore!"
7.8/10
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Posted : 3 days, 21 hours ago on 21 November 2009 06:43
(A review of Moon)
"I wanna go home..."
Speaking from a thematic perspective, Moon is the sci-fi masterpiece that The Island could have been had Michael Bay not opted to turn it into a brainless action extravaganza. In many ways, Moon (the directorial debut of Duncan Jones - otherwise known as David Bowie's son) is an affectionate throwback to an age of classic, cerebral sci-fi motion pictures (such as 2001: A Space Odyssey and Blade Runner); it's invested in areas of storytelling patience and hefty psychological investigation rarely explored in an era of Star Trek and Transformers. It's instead a simple story rich in ideas that explores several areas familiar to sci-fi fans: the concept of artificial intelligence, where bioethics is heading, and whether prolonged isolation can cause psychosis.
Moon kicks off with an advertisement for Lunar Industries: Earth's #1 provider of clean energy. This energy comes in the form of a radioactive isotope which is mined on the moon. Sam Bell (Rockwell) is the sole employee at the company's base on the dark side of the moon where he is responsible for supervision and routine maintenance of the mining equipment. As the film opens, Sam is nearing the end of his three-year contract. Due to a mechanical failure, there is no direct link between the lunar station and Earth; Sam can only send and receive recorded messages in order to communicate with his wife, daughter and bosses. An intelligent computer called GERTY (voiced by Spacey) provides Sam's only form of direct communication. But with only very little human interaction, and all of it indirect, he feels that three years is far too long to be isolated. Soon enough, Sam makes a series of discoveries that alter his understanding of his job, his life, the universe, and everything.
The less said about the meatier parts of the plot, the better. Without divulging spoilers, Moon eventually transforms into a morality tale that questions the notion of what's real and what isn't; what it means to be alive and what it means to be human. These questions propel the film towards an unsettling third act which suggests what might happen to humankind if certain technologies were fuelled by corporate greed. More importantly, as the questions pile up, the tension slowly and methodically builds...even after Sam unearths his most shocking discovery. Like Sam, a viewer will spend most of the latter half of Moon attempting to figure out what exactly is going on.
Moon exhibits a lucid influence by Stanley Kubrick's 2001: A Space Odyssey, and the nods are both frequent and uncamouflaged. Certain shots recall 2001, there's an effects sequence set to a piece of classical music, and there's the computer GERTY; a virtual clone of HAL (the nuances and intonations of Kevin Spacey's vocal performance even seem visibly influenced by Douglas Rain's voicework for 2001). For emotions, GERTY displays a smiley face that turns into a frowny face or even a crying face every so often, like the cheapest special effect the filmmakers could conceive of. But it works - and this is one of the many examples of the filmmakers' ability to make the most of their meagre budget. To create a science fiction movie with only $5 million would be difficult, yet Jones pulls it off with aplomb. Moon doesn't feature groundbreaking CGI, but it nevertheless remains enthralling from a visual standpoint. An incredibly believable lunar landscape has been constructed - and when the action shifts to the surface of the moon, there's a flawless blend of practical effects and subtle CGI. Sam's living quarters possess a familiar futuristic design that's bestowed with a realistic, lived-in quality almost foreign to this brand of sci-fi (notice, for instance, how filthy GERTY is, and that the areas Sam inhabits seem worn). Sedate camerawork courtesy of cinematographer Gary Shaw as well as Clint Mansell's transcendent, utterly haunting piano score also compound the sense of unearthly isolation.
Director Duncan Jones (formerly known as Zowie Bowie - yeah, I'd have changed my name too) has previously directed commercials. This is his first feature film and it's a promising one. For a film debut, Moon is a surprisingly ambitious effort since sci-fi is a route rarely taken by neophyte directors tackling projects without a huge budget or studio backing. By addressing intimate subject matter and keeping the film's setting mostly within the confines of the moon-base, however, Jones is freed from a majority of the warped conventions that typically define mainstream science fiction. Moon is not Star Wars-inspired space opera; it is provocative, intelligent stuff that takes the elements of "science" in science fiction seriously. If there's a flaw, it's that the film wants to say more than it has time to. In a 90-minute timeframe, the film attempts to make comments about corporate greed, the human mind, the consciousness of technology and other human advances which can't be discussed without heading into Spoiler Land. While these notes are hit well, the film tends to hit them too fast, leaving an audience to contemplate and realise it all only after they've finished watching it. Important plot points are revealed in the blink of an eye as well, and while you attempt to put it all together, the story progresses on-screen.
A terrific performance submitted by Sam Rockwell keeps a viewer caring throughout the narrative. Because there are virtually no other human characters in the film, much of the success of Moon rested solely on the shoulders of Rockwell. And it works! Rockwell (a character actor who has featured in such recent films as The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy and Matchstick Men, but has not yet managed to break through into genuine Hollywood stardom) deserves to be an Oscar contender given the weight of the material he manages to nail here - the actor delivers an affecting and credible portrayal of a loner who yearns for home, with later plot developments allowing him to show different facets of the role. Not only does Rockwell keep an audience rapt (much like Tom Hanks did for much of Cast Away), but he also puts a human face on some hefty themes.
While Moon begins like a hodgepodge of various other sci-fi flicks, director Jones and screenwriter Nathan Parker are able to breathe new life into these familiar elements; creating something unique, fresh, mesmerising and exhilarating. The conclusion is perhaps a bit too tidy, but it gives the story a sense of narrative resolution while also suggesting that larger issues are a long way from being resolved.
Moon is truly a contemporary horror movie which eschews a wearisome slasher mentality to explore the nature of identity and the perversion of human life through scientific advances and corporate skulduggery. It asks proper, stimulating questions without being cold, aloof, pretentious or even remotely boring. And it works as all the best sci-fi does - by employing special effects to complement a genuine, thought-provoking human narrative. It's not that there's anything wrong with escapist entertainment like Star Trek, but Moon is closer to the expectations of die-hards when they hear the term "sci-fi". It's very different from glossy sci-fi blockbusters - and far more satisfying.
8.8/10
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Posted : 4 days, 23 hours ago on 20 November 2009 05:22
(A review of Predator)
"She says the jungle... it just came alive and took him."
There was a period back in the 1980s when Arnold Schwarzenegger ruled Hollywood. He was the ultimate action hero, and it didn't matter in the slightest that he was a one-dimensional actor who favoured snappy one-liners over Oscar-worthy dialogue. Whether he was the action hero in Commando or the villain in The Terminator, "Ah-nuld" was a force of star-power to be reckoned with, and movie-goers flocked to see any of his action films. 1987's Predator is simply the perfect '80s movie, offering an amalgamation of the three most popular mainstream genres of that decade: action-adventure, horror, and science fiction - and it's a Schwarzenegger flick to boot. All of these components are mixed up to form this heady brew of violent action, macho posturing and ridiculously quotable dialogue, which is all set at a breakneck pace.
At its most basic narrative level, Predator is your usual men-on-a-mission movie (think The Wild Geese or The Dirty Dozen) with added flourishes of horror and sci-fi. At the beginning of the film, Dutch Schaefer (Schwarzenegger) and his battle-hardened squad of elite commandos begrudgingly accept a mission set by the CIA to rescue a group of political hostages from guerrillas in the remote jungles of Central America. The assignment seems simple enough, but shortly after rappelling into enemy territory, Dutch and his team get the feeling that something isn't quite right. Not only have they been set up by the CIA who in reality wants them to recover military intelligence, but there's also something lurking in the jungle...a creature from another planet watching their every move. As the men head to the extraction point, they are slowly targeted one by one...
The rest of the movie sustains a skilfully realised dance between the increasingly desperate commandos (who are stripped of their physical and military superiority, and must resort to any trick in order to stay alive) and the titular Predator (who mixes futuristic technology with a taste for sadistic rituals). The fact that the Predator never gives a reason for its presence on Earth makes its hunting far more ruthless. Moreover, this creature has no voice and it can't be reasoned with - it's a hunter; pure and simple. And it slaughters the commandos for no reason other than it wants to. Unsurprisingly, the movie eventually boils down to a mano-a-mano standoff between Schwarzenegger and the Predator, with the stakes more equal when Dutch discovers an invisibility method. At this point Predator announces its affinity for all things primeval, as Dutch has to reach deep inside himself and become a primordial warrior stripped of all guns and armour. The battles between Dutch and the Predator are highly exciting, and have been bestowed with an element of danger rarely felt when Arnie is typically dodging bullets - he's far more vulnerable when pitted against this strong otherworldly entity. Predator is a rare film in which a viewer gets the sense that something might just defeat Ah-nuld.
A huge part of what makes Predator such a top-shelf action flick is that it never stops charging ahead. There's a refreshingly uncomplicated plotline in place which is never dragged down by sprawling back-stories, rambling chunks of exposition or gratuitous distractions. Dutch and his commandos have a hell of a lot of personality, and the screenplay (credited to Jim & John Thomas) doles them out without ever stopping to catch a breath. The lulls in the action are always filled with something: mistrust, pig-sticking, pussy jokes, the nagging sense that something's not quite right, intense character interaction... The pacing never has the chance to drag. On top of this, Predator is one of the most quotable films in history (not far behind Arnie's Commando) - "If it bleeds, we can kill it"; "Get to the choppaaaah!"; "I ain't got time to bleed"; "You're one ugly motherfucker"...the list could keep going, but you get the idea.
This was director John McTiernan's second film, and his work here is brilliant. McTiernan has become famous for generating tension and suspense using confined locations, and for Predator he certainly uses the steamy jungle to great effect. His direction is claustrophobic and assured; confidently staging amazing action while also concentrating on tension and atmosphere. The jungle itself plays a crucial part in the proceedings, and it's wonderfully photographed by Donald McAlpine. Then there's the Predator itself. Despite being little more than a man in a suit that bleeds highlighter ink, it's a marvellous creation engineered by effects maestro Stan Winston (with some input from James Cameron). Played by Kevin Peter Hall (who stands an imposing 7'2"), the Predator is an unnerving combination of insect, reptile and professional wrestler. The creature effects are immaculate, with the invisibility camouflage optical effect still impressing to this day. Naturally, not all of the special effects stand up to this day. But happily, even the phoney-looking effects are still serviceable.
Predator features countless large and in-charge actors. Arnold Schwarzenegger leads the pack. He may not be Hollywood's greatest actor, but at the peak of his career he certainly knew how to entertain an audience. Interestingly, the film features another actor who went on to serve as Governor - Jesse Ventura. The most dynamic action sequences are saved for these two very large men, whose oversized physiques are in full display here.
Two of the most macho African American performers of the 1980s also feature in Predator - Bill Duke and Carl Weathers. Both men submit highly authoritative performances. Sonny Landham was hired for the film under one condition: that he had a bodyguard with him at all times - not to protect Sonny but to protect everyone around the actor (he was prone to starting bar fights). That trivia fact reveals pretty much everything you need to know about the badass Landham. Rounding out the cast is the endearing Elpidia Carrillo as Anna, in addition to Richard Chaves and Shane Black as members of Dutch's unit. This was the film debut of Black, who became famous for his screenwriting. Indeed, Black penned Lethal Weapon, and spent his free time on the Predator set writing his screenplay for The Last Boy Scout.
With its thrilling, high-octane mix of Rambo and Aliens, Predator certainly delivers on its promise of non-stop, energetic action - and it does not disappoint in the macho department. It's cheesy as hell, of course, and slightly dated, but it's also entertaining and cool as hell, with tonnes of quotable lines and an utterly unforgettable villain. Predator is an action movie with something for everyone, and a jewel in Arnie's career.
9.5/10
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Posted : 5 days, 21 hours ago on 19 November 2009 07:11
(A review of Hot Rod)
"I'd rather die than live in a world where I can't kick your ass."
It'd be reasonable to dive straight into the crucial problem with Hot Rod - the filmmakers behind it attempted to expand a one-joke premise (the type that might have worked in a Saturday Night Live short) into a feature-length motion picture. The product is a 10-minute gem stretched out to a lazy 85-minute goof which can't even begin to sustain its wafer-thin premise over the comparatively bloated runtime. The sporadic flashes of inspiration and a few funny moments are overwhelmed by a lot of aimless noodling around and silly pratfalls in lieu of genuine wit and cleverness. While this was intended to be a lovable loser comedy, Hot Rod comes across as a product assembled with an Allen key designed for quick sale that was made to cash in on the likes of Napoleon Dynamite and Anchorman. The leading role was originally written for Will Ferrell, and the antics of Andy Samberg in the film are quite derivative of cinema's leading Man-Child. This is Samberg's feature film debut, but while he's a performer of sizeable energy, his range of laugh impact is limited.
The story, such as it is, centres on a self-proclaimed stuntman named Rod Kimble (Samberg). Rod was raised to believe his now deceased biological father was Evel Knievel's test rider, and he dreams of one day being able to defeat his step-father Frank (McShane) in a fight. When Frank is in urgent need of a heart transplant, Rod decides to raise $50,000 for the operation by staging a stunt that's worthy of Evel Knievel: jumping 15 buses (one more than Knievel ever dared). Supported by his loyal crew - younger half-brother Kevin (Taccone), friends Dave (Hader) and Rico (McBride), as well as Denise (Fisher) who lives next door - Rod begins to plan his big jump so he can keep Frank alive and finally kick his ass.
It would appear that Samberg, screenwriter Pam Brady and director Akiva Schaffer put together a literal checklist for each scene in order to maximise the comic potential. Funny shirts? Got it. Funny hair? Check. Funny words and/or pronunciation? Uh huh. Funny song? Yes indeedy. The problem with the gags in Hot Rod, though, is that the "funny" is relative - which means it's funny to see a mate of yours engaged in these antics because you know their personality. Unfortunately without the benefit of this perspective, the goofs are sometimes amusing, but more often less so, and the film comes across as more of a self-indulgent series of skits. It seems that the filmmakers also have a real familiarity and affection for '80s movie conventions. In particular, Hot Rod employs the increasingly clichéd framework of John Hughes films/teen coming-of-age stories as a backdrop for the series of disconnected gags. This framework necessitates a competitor for Denise's affection, a second act revelation about Rod's father that shatters his confidence, and a final, triumphant slow-motion middle-of-the-street march that leads to his redemptive jump attempt.
The fact that the crew behind Hot Rod are Saturday Night Live alumni would explain why the movie feels like an extended skit. Rather than aiming for honest laughs through clever writing or carefully nurtured comedic set-pieces, the filmmakers opt for a veritable salad of movie references, bone-crunching pratfalls, flat-out silliness and pointless comic digressions. The sequences in which Rod's ill-advised stabs at stunt-work result in him being bashed, burned and nearly drowned may be amusing when witnessed in two-minute chunks on YouTube, but seeing then running one after the other for close to 90 minutes grows tedious. Rod is a dolt who ends up failing and getting hurt not due to bad luck or an inability to judge his abilities and shortcomings - it's because he's an idiot. This could have worked if he was an endearing idiot, but he's no Will Ferrell or Inspector Clouseau. Granted, Hot Rod does supply a few laughs. Then again, it's not hard to laugh at brutal pratfalls (the producers of Jackass made millions off that premise). But one can only laugh at Rod's missteps and poor stunts a few times before they're just no longer funny. Furthermore, the punch lines are incredibly predictable. While training for the big jump, Rod asks his friends to hold him underwater for a period of time to strengthen his lungs. You can easily predict what's going to happen...
There's no doubt the guys behind Hot Rod can be funny. However the dynamics (specifically in concept, timing and execution) that work for a short comedy sketch don't translate into success for a cohesive feature film. It's for this reason that isolated bits and pieces of the film are funny, but if taken as a whole it fails to gel. Even then, the film doesn't necessitate repeated viewings and after seeing it once it loses much of the comedic punch it originally packed. At the very least, Hot Rod is a breezy farce and a fun watch that's fairly easy to enjoy, and it also manages to provide an answer to the eternal question: who would win in a fight between a grilled cheese sandwich and a taco?
4.9/10
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Posted : 6 days, 19 hours ago on 18 November 2009 08:42
(A review of Eraser)
"You've just been erased."
At its most basic level, Eraser is a shameless Arnie movie - another member the action movie subgenre wherein the Austrian Oak smirks, munches on cigars and dispatches several battalions of nameless extras. It's loud, violent, sporadically funny and overflowing with action set-pieces and nifty weaponry. The only thing Eraser lacks is a spin - at the end of the day, it's just a fairly undistinguishable Arnold Schwarzenegger film. This is not a particularly bad thing, however, since it's therefore able to forgo all pretensions in order to revel in the fun, over-the-top action sequences. The final result is flawed but undeniably enjoyable.
The Schwarzenegger role in Eraser is U.S. Marshal John Kruger. He works with the witness protection program as an "eraser", which basically means that, as a protective measure, he "erases" the identities of the witnesses he's assigned to protect. As to be expected from an Arnie film, Kruger is considered to be the best in his line of work. His latest assignment is Lee Cullen; a top ranking executive for Cyrez Corporation (a U.S. weapons manufacturer) who uncovers evidence of a political plot to put a new super-weapon in the hands of an American enemy. But Cullen and Kruger soon discover that the level of treason extends past the Cyrez Corporation and into high levels of government.
The plot is expectedly thin stuff; an excuse to tie together rip-roaring action scenes. The action ranges from sensational to downright silly. Director Charles Russell (The Mask, Nightmare on Elm Street 3) capably shapes the story and paces the movie. The script is moderately well-structured, and wonderfully seasoned with Schwarzeneggerisms. Eraser is also another attempt at a "high tech" action flick (in the mould of Mission: Impossible and Hackers) - that is, it's a collection of the usual explosions and shootouts which are placed within a plot that involves all types of electronic gadgetry. Not much attention is paid to whether the science is feasible...but if it looks and sounds awesome, why not utilise it? While Eraser is standard stuff, there are some fun variations - mainly in the fact that many of the gunfights feature weapons which can shoot through walls (with an x-ray sight to boot).
So with explosions, stunts, nifty guns and "Ah-nuld", what else could you ask for? Well, a fresher script - the whole enterprise is hampered by a "been there, done that" feel. The much-worked-over screenplay (credited to Tony Puryear and Walon Green) sorely needed more work, particularly in the character department. The characters are utterly generic - Kruger is totally unstoppable (even after being stabbed and shot) and lacks any dimension, while Cullen is nothing more than a stereotypical, forgettable damsel in distress who does barely anything to further the plot, and Deguerin is a standard issue bad guy (with Caan using every hammy mannerism possible to sell what amounts to a third-rate James Bond villain). However, to the credit of the screenwriters, some of the more painful action movie standbys are avoided - the male & female leads do not fall in love, and (happily) they aren't always at each other's throats. That said, there are countless other problems with Eraser. It simply runs out of steam halfway through; having offered up its most spectacular set-pieces long before the lengthy 120-minute picture nears its climax. Even some of the best scenes are marred by dated CGI, which is especially disappointing considering that the budget could have paid for a small African nation.
There's a reason why Arnie kicking ass has become part of movie culture...it's awesome fun!! Eraser should hearten Schwarzenegger fans who disliked his ventures beyond the action realm (for instance the bloated parody Last Action Hero, and the comedy Junior). This is Ah-nuld at his muscle-bound, gun-toting best: mowing down bad guys without taking much of a breather. He does little more than walk through the ostensibly tailor-made role of John Kruger, but the big man is one hell of an amazing screen presence, and he can still deliver snappy one-liners with assurance (such as the iconic line "You're luggage" which he utters after shooting an alligator). Thankfully, Arnie has been surrounded by a more than satisfactory supporting cast. The acting is extremely passable, especially from Robert Pastorelli who seems to be having an absolute blast in the Joe Pesci-type sidekick role.
All in all, Eraser is pretty standard-issue Arnold Schwarzenegger, and a perfectly adequate time filler. It's hardly original, but with Arnie and some spectacular set-pieces, this is a thrilling ride. Just don't expect to remember much about the film five minutes after you finish watching it.
6.2/10
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Posted : 1 week ago on 17 November 2009 05:27
(A review of Raw Deal)
"Because of you a lot of people are dead. And now it's your turn. "
Released immediately after The Terminator and Commando, 1986's Raw Deal is a straightforward Arnold Schwarzenegger vehicle which was designed to exploit the star's new image as an unstoppable one-man army. Films like these aren't generally well received (as exemplified by the generally poor reviews it endured), but this reviewer had no problem enjoying the hell out of it - especially since it features "Ah-nuld" at the pinnacle of his career. However, while enjoyable, Raw Deal is admittedly nothing more than a run-of-the-mill action flick; a lightweight spar through the rule-breaking cop conventions without a skerrick of narrative originality.
In the film, the Austrian Oak stars as Mark Kaminsky. He's a former FBI agent (ejected from the bureau for heavy treatment of a lowlife suspect) who has become forced to suffer the indignity of a job as a sheriff in a small town. When one of Kaminsky's old pals from the FBI (McGavin) contacts him with an opportunity for reinstatement, he jumps at the chance. His assignment: to infiltrate a Chicago Mafia family and destroy it.
There are a bunch of terrific action moments scattered generously throughout Raw Deal; building to the mega adrenaline rush of a climax. For the final act, Schwarzenegger's character basically gets fed up, decides to lock & load, and prompts an '80s arming up montage (reminiscent of Commando). First order of business: to drive around a gravel pit dispatching as many villains as possible to the tune of the Rolling Stones' Satisfaction. Second order of business: take out the entire Chicago mob using a ridiculous amount of firepower. Believable? Not at all. Fun? Fuck yes! The climax can easily be considered moronic since Schwarzenegger is invincible and unshootable, but this is exactly what an '80s audience expected of the Austrian Oak - he was an invulnerable killer like no other. Arnie also gets plenty of corny one-liners to disperse here, such as the classic line "You should not drink and bake."
Raw Deal plays out as if the filmmakers decided upon the action set-pieces first before conceiving a suitable story to justify them all. A standard mob infiltration plotline is on offer here, complemented with the usual subplot of the former FBI agent wanting to get back on the force. Generally speaking, the police thriller genre is not well suited for '80s Schwarzenegger carnage. The committee of screenwriters, along with director John Irvin seem aware of this fact until the final showdown when the film transforms from police thriller to outright '80s actioner. Whether the climax will satisfy depends entirely on your expectations - it's undeniably fun watching Schwarzenegger dish out the trademark goods, but others may be disappointed that the action compromises an otherwise serious, more drama-oriented film.
There are tonnes of flaws to point out in Raw Deal; a surplus of cheesy moments which hinder the film's fun value (such as the dreadful final scene), a lingering sense of predictability, very little in the way of originality, and there isn't as much action as one would expect considering its origins as a Schwarzenegger action vehicle. Subplots and periphery characters are mostly shoved aside in favour of keeping things as stripped-down and simple as possible (for instance Kaminsky's wife shows up during the first 20 minutes, and then disappears completely). At least the performances are adequate thanks to an ideal cast. Robert Davi in particular delivers a rock-solid performance; supported by passable acting courtesy of Sam Wanamaker as a crime boss and Kathryn Harold as the love interest of the picture. Arnie admittedly pales in comparison to these performers whenever he's given dialogue to deliver, but he's still infinitely more watchable and charismatic than, say, Van Damme or Steven Seagal. And, naturally, his screen presence is unbelievably awesome.
To be honest, I miss movies like Raw Deal. You know, old-school '80s action fodder starring a muscle-clad performer such as Sylvester Stallone or Arnold Schwarzenegger. Despite flaws, this is an easy film to enjoy with its numerous action rampages and a high level of pure machismo. Raw Deal may not be a good movie, but it never pretends to be. It's enjoyable and mindless - a film best enjoyed with a bunch of friends, plenty of beer, a pizza, and (most importantly) an uncritical attitude.
6.0/10
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Posted : 1 week, 1 day ago on 16 November 2009 06:21
(A review of Commando)
"All fucking hell is going to break loose..."
Though I walk through the valley of shadow and death, I shall fear no evil; for lord John Matrix will protect me; his big fucking guns and huge muscles, they comfort me.
In the beginning, there was Commando. And the God of '80s Action Excess looked upon it and saw that it was good. And lo did Arnold Schwarzenegger massacre hundreds of mercenaries in displays of awesome ultra-violence, and Alyssa Milano did rejoice. Amen.
After the triple play of The Terminator and both Conan films, Arnold Schwarzenegger graduated to top billing with Commando; a classic '80s action movie which fetishes explosions, violence and guns, in addition to containing an assortment of evil villains, cheesy one-liners, big guns, bigger guns and enough dead bodies to keep a mortician's convention busy for days. It was produced by illustrious action super-producer Joel Silver and written by distinguished action writer Steven E. de Souza, not to mention that the primary star is none other than the iconic Arnie. On any level above that of red-faced guilty pleasure, there's simply no way to defend Commando. It's a gloriously primitive and cartoonish action vehicle which makes absolutely no bones about its absurdity. It never pretends to be anything other than a simple-minded exercise in vicarious violence. Its heart and soul is best summarised by a line of dialogue - a female character, while witnessing two über-macho behemoths engaged in mano-a-mano fisticuffs, exclaims "These guys eat too much red meat!"
Schwarzenegger plays Colonel John Matrix (complying with the First Law of Early '80s Action Movies, this is one awesome name); a former special ops soldier now retired and living in a secluded cabin with his daughter Jenny (Milano). Matrix believes his old life of violence, gunfire and post-mortem one-liners is over, but a former dictator is unwilling to let him rest in peace. Said dictator is Arius (Hedaya) who, with the help of the psychotic soldier Bennett (Wells), enacts a plan to regain power in the third-world hellhole he was ousted from. They wish for Matrix to do their bidding, and they kidnap his daughter to convince him to comply with their instructions. But there's one thing they forgot: nobody fucks with John Matrix.
It's the way Matrix dispatches with the villain's original plan and summarily devises his own that makes Commando so exhilarating. Director Mark L. Lester serves the action spectacle straight-up, with little aesthetic flourish, emotional bracketing or even downtime. The makers realised that Schwarzenegger's primal screen presence needs little accoutrement, and the action hero is therefore just given the opportunity to bulldoze through the narrative (and literally through a sporting goods store at one stage). Matrix is less a character than a force of nature, and the cutesy scenes meant to establish his loving fatherly nature with Jenny at the beginning of the movie are impossible to take seriously. Matrix only makes sense when he's armed to the teeth with an assortment of weaponry; blasting his way through hundreds of henchmen like an automated turret when given a line of immobile enemies to dispatch (there's no reason to point out how convenient it is that he has a limitless supply of ammunition, and seems to find bigger weapons just by looking down). Commando simply surges forward from action set-piece to action set-piece; pausing only for one-liners and shots of Alyssa Milano sneering at her captors. The film lasts less than 90 minutes, but one could spend two hours talking about it because it contains so much cool stuff.
Commando works on just about every level, but it's the script that makes it such a gem. Classic one-liners range from "Let off some steam, Bennett" (after a character is impaled with a steam pipe), "I eat Green Berets for breakfast. And right now I'm very hungry" and the classic "I let him go" (after dropping some bloke off a cliff). Gold. Pure gold. Commando is the movie that helped to forge and solidify the Schwarzenegger action movie persona. At the time of this movie's release, the former Mr. Universe was known as a cyborg from the future and a loin-cloth-clad barbarian. He had already uttered the immortal "I'll be back" catchphrase (in The Terminator), and Commando immediately announces its self-aware silliness when Arnie repeats this line to the movie's central villain. This is just one of the many one-liners, puns and badass phrases peppered throughout the film; making the consciously bad dialogue second in volume to the number of bullets fired during the scant runtime.
Steven E. de Souza's script is pitch-perfect, Mark L. Lester's direction is immaculate, Matthew F. Leonetti's cinematography is beautiful, the editing is terrific and the score by James Horner is one of the coolest you'll ever hear (not to mention it gives even more power to the unique visual style). The acting, meanwhile, is spot-on right down the line. Schwarzenegger is enormously likeable and funny, and he's an awesome physical actor. Arnie reportedly performed nearly all of his own stunts (this included jumping through windows, doing gruelling fights and hanging onto a plane's landing gear as it travelled at 65 miles an hour), and the price was just a dislocated shoulder and some stitches...what a guy. Vernon Wells' performance is classic - the actor was fresh from Mad Max 2 and Weird Science when he stepped into the role of Bennett. The banter between Wells and Arnie is utterly iconic. Rae Dawn Chong as the token female confidently fulfils her duties, while Alyssa Milano is easily likeable as Matrix's daughter.
The action genre reached its pinnacle in 1985 with Commando. No movie since has been able to wield a proper combination of violence, awesome one-liners and absurdity like this vintage Arnie vehicle did. Flicks like this are an endangered species. With action movies becoming increasingly more complex (with less action set-pieces), this is a reminder of a simpler era of moviemaking. Sure, Commando could be called a dumb movie, but those deriding it with such harsh words are not accepting the film as what it was intended to be. Don't believe the film connoisseurs who claim that Citizen Kane is the best and most essential film ever - Commando is the film you MUST see!!!
I love this movie. I love it with an unhealthy obsession.
8.5/10
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Posted : 1 week, 3 days ago on 15 November 2009 03:46
(A review of Observe and Report)
"The world has no use for another scared man. Right now, the world needs a fucking hero."
Every review of Observe and Report will most likely mention Paul Blart: Mall Cop at some stage. The connection between these movies is understandable since both were released during 2009 and both provided satirical portrayals of mall cops. But while Paul Blart was a genial, good-natured, family-friendly story of a blue-collar schlub, Observe and Report is dark, demented, twisted, perverse and absolutely not for a family audience. Logically, one would think that R-rated content would afford an edge which was sorely missing from the bland Paul Blart: Mall Cop, but Observe and Report is merely smutty for the sake of smut, and it's a far worse film than its PG-rated counterpart. A note to filmmakers: movies about mall cops are destined to fail.
Observe and Report concerns Ronnie Barnhardt (Rogen); a shopping mall security guard who, at the beginning of the movie, makes it his duty to catch a flasher who has been exposing his privates to females in the vicinity. Above all, Ronnie is determined to protect vacuous, slutty make-up counter girl Brandi (Faris). Meanwhile, he barely gives the time of day to a temporarily disabled and good-natured coffee vendor (Wolfe) who takes a romantic shine to the mall cop. With Ronnie obsessively hunting the flasher and desperate to join the police force, he embarks on a campaign of terror...this leads to a date-rape (he has sex with an almost unconscious Brandi who's drunk and vomiting), smashing local kids over the head with their own skateboards, labelling an Asian mall worker 'Saddam Hussein', and some excessively violent - and pointless - showdowns with cops & villains.
Ronnie is a mere clod. How he managed to get the job as a security guard, let alone head of security, is mystifying considering his many psychological difficulties. Ronnie's answer to any problem is to yell, curse, punch or shoot (occasionally at the same time). A number of scenes involve the mall cop attacking people or attempting to single-handedly defeat a horde of police officers in almost surrealistic scenes of obnoxiously unfunny ultra-violence. How the filmmakers thought this Neanderthal was humorous is a mystery. Worse, writer-director Jody Hill made an absolute howler of a decision to position Ronnie as the hapless hero of the hour who gains respect from mall workers and the police force through indefensible actions, which an audience is encouraged to laugh at and enjoy rather than justifiably abhor.
This could have been all well and good, if only the film was genuinely funny. Observe and Report dishes out black comedy and gross-out humour...only without the comedy or humour. At one stage in the movie, Ronnie is being told that he was unsuccessful at getting a job as a police officer. As it turns out, a number of people were listening in as Ronnie received the news. One of these people soon enters the room and proclaims "I thought this was going to be funny, but actually it's just really sad". I can't think of any better words I could use to describe this movie...
It's difficult to tell what kind of comedy that writer-director Hill was aiming for. Observe and Report is a dark, witless dark comedy that appears to confuse acts of violence, racism and rape for humour. Hill also relies heavily on foul language and gratuitous nudity to get a rise out of the audience. Black, subversive and politically incorrect humour can be brilliant in capable hands and with the right purpose (like the brilliant Bad Santa), but here it's offensively bereft of any wit and, at the end of the day, simply unpleasant. Throughout the film's running time, it's hard to tell whether you should laugh or cringe in discomfort. The only positives of this flick are surface-level stuff - the crisp, slick cinematography admittedly makes the film easier to watch, and the film has been assembled skilfully.
Seth Rogen is completely incapable of making Ronnie likeable or even a character to sympathise with. Rogen is usually recognised for his amiable, witty slacker persona, but all of these characteristics are quickly lost amid the wreckage of such an appalling character. Meanwhile Anna Faris is at her one-note limit. Faris is usually likeable in the roles she plays, but there's very little reason to care about her in Observe and Report - she's a drunken bimbo without a shred of self-respect. Ray Liotta is also on hand as a cop who rather bitterly hates Ronnie (at least one character in this cinematic atrocity has a brain), while Michael Peña appears to sleepwalk throughout the film as one of Ronnie's co-workers. Collette Wolfe is the only cast member whose acting is truly heartfelt. She's one of the film's limited bright spots.
It's crucial to note that the creators of Observe and Report didn't set out to emulate Paul Blart: Mall Cop, and the makers of both movies even shared information with each other to make sure they weren't stepping on each other's toes. So why is it, then, that Observe and Report truly is just a version of Paul Blart: Mall Cop for adults? In Observe and Report, Ronnie is useless and pudgy (like Paul Blart: Mall Cop), lives with his supportive mother (like Paul Blart), takes his job far too seriously (like Paul Blart), has a condition which requires medication (like Paul Blart), has a crush on a worker at the mall (like Paul Blart), and dreams of firing a gun (like Paul Blart) but can't actually have a gun (like Paul Blart). There's a crime happening in the mall (like Paul Blart) and solving it will be Ronnie's redemption (like Paul Blart), and even though everyone will laugh at him along the way (like in Paul Blart) he won't give up (like Paul Blart: Mall Cop)...
Observe and Report grows increasingly bleak and ludicrous as time drags on until it ends on a sentimental yet still vulgar note. The climactic chase sequence features an obese, overcoat-wearing flasher running through the mall with the camera fixated on his grotesque equipment for what feels like hours instead of minutes...the fact that several minutes are spent observing his penis in slow motion just about sums up the flaccid quality of this lazy, awful motion picture. Observe and Report possesses all the earmarks of a low-budget indie product trying too self-consciously to be cute, coy, clever, unconventional and groundbreaking.
2.7/10
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